'Northern birds are lazy, ugly w***** who smell of burgers': Adam Kay

EXCLUSIVE: ‘Northern birds are lazy, ugly w***** who smell of burgers’: Mrs Brown’s Boys writer and best-selling author’s extraordinary attack on women

  • Ex-doctor Adam Kay, who wrote the hit book This is Going to Hurt, penned the words for his band
  • Kay, 39, described women from northern England were ‘desperately ugly hippos’
  • He also mocked Down’s Syndrome babies in the song written 15 years ago
  • Today he apologised unreservedly for any offence caused 

Best-selling author Adam Kay wrote a song in which he dismissed women from northern England as ‘lazy, ugly w***** who smell of burgers’, MailOnline can reveal.

The ex-doctor from Brighton described the women as ‘desperately ugly hippos’ with a ‘peanut for a brain’ before adding ‘There’s nothing fun to be found up the M1’.

Kay, who wrote the hit memoir This is Going to Hurt which topped the charts, also co-wrote a song mocking babies with Down’s Syndrome.

The 39-year old, who also wrote episodes of BBC TV series Mrs Brown’s Boys has tried to distance himself from his words, which he wrote with a friend while a junior doctor in a band, but the lyrics are still readily available online.

Kay, who is preparing for a sell-out show in London later this month and a tour, apologised ‘unreservedly’ for his words written while he was a student 15 years ago.

A source close to the writer he was hugely ’embarrassed and sorry’ about the songs and had been trying to remove all trace from the web without success.

Best-selling author Adam Kay wrote a song in which he dismissed women from northern England as ‘lazy, ugly w***** who smell of burgers’, MailOnline can reveal

Kay, who wrote the hit memoir This is Going to Hurt which topped the charts, also co-wrote a song mocking babies with Down’s Syndrome

The 39-year old, who also wrote episodes of BBC TV series Mrs Brown’s Boys has tried to distance himself from his words, which he wrote with a friend while a junior doctor in a band, but the lyrics are still readily available online

Kay was one half of the band Amateur Transplants with fellow junior doctor Suman Biswas.

One song they wrote was called Northern Birds.

The two doctors state: ‘Listen up to what we have to say… Northern birds are lazy, ugly w****s who smell of burgers…

‘You’re much better staying in the South. Northern birds are desperate ugly hippos.

‘Dressed in burberry, with a peanut for a brain and an accent that makes you want to die.

‘Now you’ve been warned, they’re all physically deformed. Northern birds are all obese and they’re riddled with disease.’ 

Another song entitled Your Baby about babies born with Downs Syndrome pokes fun at them and asks pregnant mothers carrying them: ‘How would you feel about a termination?’

It also says: ‘Your baby’s got a flattened nose, a widened gap between its toes.

‘It’s smaller than it’s supposed to be. The scan shows your baby’s got an imperforate rectum.

‘And there’s a big hole in his atrial septum. He’s got the signs of left heart failure… And quite abnormal genitalia.’

Kay gave up medicine several years ago to concentrate on his writing and has gone on to write for comics Mitchell and Webb and has best sellers with This is Going to Hurt and his current book ‘Twas the Nightshift Before Christmas.’

Kay, who is preparing for a sell-out show in London later this month and a tour, apologised ‘unreservedly’ for his words written while he was a student 15 years ago. A source close to the writer he was hugely ’embarrassed and sorry’ about the songs

Kay was one half of the band Amateur Transplants with fellow junior doctor Suman Biswas. Dr Biswas has continued practicing medicine and is an NHS anaesthetist in Epsom, Surrey

Reflecting on the songs, he told Mail Online: ‘As a medical student over 15 years ago, I was part of a group that recorded some songs for a ‘RAG week’ charity album, including a couple in terrible taste that crossed a line.

‘I hugely regret my part in it and apologise unreservedly for the offence I have unthinkingly caused.’

A source added: ‘He is very embarrassed by these songs and sorry too.

‘He has asked himself ‘What was I thinking?’ singing these songs and he has been trying for some time to get them off the internet completely.

‘He doesn’t stand by those lyrics at all, but it was a different time and he was a student who was also raising money for charity.

‘Most of us look back on our student days with some regret. He is no different. But he has gone on to write some top comedies and books since so people appreciate and respect his work.’

Dr Biswas has continued practicing medicine and is an NHS anaesthetist in Epsom, Surrey.

Mail Onlinecontacted the hospital where he works for comment.

On his web page he makes no mention of the two offensive sings, but recalls his time performing with Kay without referring to him in person.

The two doctors state: ‘Listen up to what we have to say… Northern birds are lazy, ugly w****s who smell of burgers… ‘You’re much better staying in the South. Northern birds are desperate ugly hippos’

Reflecting on the songs, he told Mail Online: ‘As a medical student over 15 years ago, I was part of a group that recorded some songs for a ‘RAG week’ charity album, including a couple in terrible taste that crossed a line. ‘I hugely regret my part in it and apologise unreservedly for the offence I have unthinkingly caused’

He says: ‘In the late 90s, Suman and a fellow student started writing and performing parody songs together at medical school revue shows.

‘They recorded an album together whose songs accidentally went mega-viral (including the cult-classic London Underground Song) and catapulted the pair to huge internet fame under the name Amateur Transplants.

‘The pair have stayed prominent in the iTunes Comedy Top Ten singles and album charts for the last few years, even replacing Tim Minchin at Number One.’

‘But after 14 years writing and performing together, the two members of Amateur Transplants finally went their separate ways in 2011 and have not shared a stage since.

 

 

 

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