Reddit is unfortunately a hotbed for stories about absolutely despicable, wet-turd, soggy diaper dads out there, so when we come across a rare wholesome gem of a man, we have to share the swoon-worthy vibes to remind everyone that good men do exist — even if they seem to be few and far between.
For example, one soon-to-be dad posted a sweet request on the forum’s Parenting subreddit, and our hearts and warm and fuzzy from his dedication to his new role as a papa and parenting partner to his wife. The man wrote, “It’s too late in the night to call family. But I wanted to tell someone. In a few hours I will be a first-time dad. This will probably get buried in Reddit. I find myself wondering how I can help my wife through her c-section. Does anyone have any great advice here?”
Redditors rushed to his virtual side to offer their congratulations and advice, with one user writing, “Wooohooo! Recovering from a c-section can be really tough — make sure you (or others) take care of alllllll the things so mama can take care of healing herself. Laundry, food, animals/pets, snacks, more food, cleaning, etc.” They added, “But also call your family (or hers) they want to know! (Even if it means waking them up! Best reason to be woken up!!!)”
Another Redditor advised, “Be patient with her and help her with anything she needs! I had a c-section and it was ROUGH. You can’t move without being in excruciating pain and to top it off you have a newborn to take care of!” They gave specific examples, writing, “Be close by and make sure she’s got lots of water and snacks and that she’s comfortable at home. I even had to have my husband help me go to the bathroom cause it was too painful to sit down or even pull up my pants. Make sure at home she’s got a nice space to be for a few days that doesn’t require her to use her abs a lot (I was on the couch for about 4-5 days before I finally went back to bed cause it was so hard to sit up).”
“Congratulations!!,” another user began, continuing, “Get her a heating pad, and don’t let her do any moving on her own! She needs to take it easy and rest physically as much as possible. Make sure she stays up on her pain meds after and takes a stool softener. Please do this lol. Recommend she wears a belly band after for postpartum bellies, the support helps the pain and healing. Don’t laugh for the first week, it hurts so bad. Enjoy snuggling your precious bundle of joy!”
One mom commented, “Get a reading pillow!! When I sat too deep in a chair/couch it was super hard to get up. The reading pillow helped me be comfortable plus it made getting up easier.” The added, “Also, when the baby cries, try to get there first. After my c-section my instincts made me want to rush over and rushing made the pain a hundred times worse. It was a lifesaver whenever I knew my husband was on his way so I could take my time getting up.”
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Their final suggestion is one moms everywhere will appreciate: “Take lots of photos of the baby while at the hospital. I had all these cute photo ideas planned but I was in excruciating pain so I stayed in bed instead. Also, take some photos of your wife with the baby too ☺️”
One user focused on postpartum recovery more than the c-section itself, writing, “Postpartum is a b*tch. All the hormones will be overwhelming. She will cry and cry, well I know I did for no apparent reason. She will need lots of love and support. Wash the bottles, help her change, help her shower if she needs help. Lots of love and support from the person she needs it most. Congratulations to you dad and of course mom!”
Another parent echoed the previous user’s sentiment, writing, “Congratulations! Read up on the 4th trimester & the mental load. Keep your wife hydrated, fed and watered. Make sure she has time to shower/bathe. Your baby is not going to believe they are a separate entity to your wife for a little while. Be patient. Communication is going to be absolutely key.”
They continued, “When I had my daughter, baby blues set in thick and fast and I cried all the time. I resented [my partner] as he had most of his bodily autonomy whilst I had a potato that fed every 3 minutes and I couldn’t do anything — I felt so trapped (I exclusively breastfed). You have absolutely got this!”
Another dad cheered on OP, writing, “Father of a 2-year-old here. My wife had a c-section as well. Just do everything you can to facilitate her being able to form a bond with the baby. My wife had a bad reaction to the meds they used during the c-section, and couldn’t hold our little guy for several hours after he was born. That was really hard on her, especially since she was mostly immobile for the next day and a half after that.”
He continued, “Just make sure you’re helping her get as much skin-to-skin time as possible, and dote on her as much as you can. Also, some general new-parent advice: there are very few mistakes you can make that hundreds of thousands of parents haven’t already made. Babies are amazingly resilient, and the best you can do is good enough.” The fellow dad sweetly added, “Best of luck to you! Feel free to reach out if you need any support. I’m rooting for you!”
One user really got into the nitty-gritty of it all, writing, “Keep in mind she’s having major abdominal surgery, so do all the lifting, including the baby, for two weeks. (You will not break them!) There’s a huge hormonal swing between love and terror and guilt and awe — be patient and reassuring that all will be well, even if her brain is on loop saying something else. (On top of physical pain from surgery.)”
“Many women will push themselves to the limit and beyond without realizing,” they explained, continuing, “Tell her to be kind to herself and ask what you can do to help accomplish that — though also, don’t wait to be asked about everything, just do what needs to be done for them. She will desperately need your help to get some sleep and many women feel as though they “can’t” until x is done. The solution is not to tell her to ignore x — just do it for her while she’s sleeping. Praise the strength and beauty of her body for pulling off this feat, and don’t buy into pressure for ‘bouncing back’ before she’s even healed.”
“Look for joy, not for happiness,” they advised. “Tiny things will blow your mind — share them with her! Offer to take pictures. Treasure how ridiculous and floppy tiny human babies are. Accept the love and joy you receive from your family and friends — it can be startling in its intensity. And accept some people are dealing with their own past, and they may not react how you expect at all; it’s best to not take it personally. Prepare to feel the most unprepared you’ve ever felt, and know she’s feeling it too.”
OP, likely blown away by the support received from kind internet strangers, responded, “…. thank you …. 😊”
We agree with Reddit — he’s already off to a phenomenal start as a father, and we love to see it. This is one lucky baby … and the kind of birthing partner every pregnant person deserves.
Before you go, check out these unbelievable stories about Reddit’s worst dads.
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