Kaitlyn Bristowe is taking a moment to step away from the screen and embrace the things that make her the happiest.
In a lengthy Instagram post on Thursday, the former Bachelorette star, 33, opened up about the mental struggles she’s been experiencing from social media recently and the ways in which she has managed to get past them.
Despite having moments of “doubts, worries, and anxiety,” Bristowe — who called it quits with Shawn Booth four months ago, following their season 19 finale engagement — said she’s “the happiest I’ve been in a while.”
“If I’m being honest, I’ve been having (minor) anxiety the last couple nights. Nothing specific, just worried about a bunch of little things that are out of my control,” she explained. “I caught myself caring what other people were saying about me.. People who DON’T actually care about ME. How ridiculous right?”
Bristowe explained that her worrying caused her to lose sleep, become more irritable at the “irrelevant BS on social media,” and have part of her days ruined due to the insignificant matters.
It wasn’t until her best friend reminded her that Instagram was “not a real moment,” but rather “fleeting,” that Bristowe decided to refocus her mindset.
“I took a few deep breaths, put my phone down, and got lost in my book. (best feeling ever),” she said. “Just wanted to share, that even though I am the happiest I’ve been in a while, I’m still human. We all are.”
“I still have my moments, my doubts, my worries, my anxiety. But as long as I continue to have self compassion, GRATITUDE, and self love, I’ll continue to grow,” she added.
Along with the candid post, Bristowe shared a makeup-free selfie, which she said made her feel “comfortable in my own skin.”
“I had just finished days of full glam, photo shoots, and filming. And loved having a fresh face,” the reality star wrote. “I often have to remind myself that I actually feel sexier like this, than I do dolled up and in edited glam shots.”
“It’s social media that sometimes warps my thoughts of what is ‘beautiful’. (Being done up is beautiful too),” Bristowe finished. “But what’s REALLY beautiful is happiness. And overall, I’m pretty f*ckin happy.”
In November, Bristowe and Booth officially ended their engagement in an exclusive statement to PEOPLE.
“After three incredible years, we have decided to go our separate ways. This difficult decision comes after thoughtful, respectful consideration. Even though we are parting as a couple, we’re very much committed to remaining friends and we will continue to support each other,” the couple said.
“Due to the nature of how we met, our relationship has always been very public, and we have enjoyed sharing it with all of you, but we ask that you respect our decision and our privacy at this time,” they added.
Almost three months later, Bristowe announced that she was in a new relationship with Bachelorette alum Jason Tartick, who competed on Becca Kufrin’s season of the ABC reality series.
Tartick, 30, who met Bristowe on her podcast — Off the Vine with Kaitlyn Bristowe — told Today in January that they’ve been a steady item for “about a month or so.”
“We were friends. A little banter here and there and friendship turned into a relationship,” he explained.
In February, Bristowe subtly spoke about her failed relationship with Booth and her new romance with Tartick in a post on Instagram.
“Choose the kind of love that feels right, the kind of love that makes you understand why it didn’t work out with anyone else. Choose the kind of life that makes you so damn happy you kept fighting for the things you wanted, for the way in which your heart asked you to believe in more,” she said.
Booth, 31, also talked about the pain of seeing her go public with someone else on Ben Higgins and Ashley Iaconetti‘s podcast Almost Famous: In Depth.
“It’s nerve-wracking every time I pick up my phone. I haven’t been on Twitter in months just because I don’t want to scroll the mentions. Going on Instagram, I do that for business purposes, and always get caught with scrolling. that’s always tough. You just have a pit in your stomach.”
He continued: “That’s the hard part and with her moving on so quickly, I just have a tough time understanding why she would put this out everywhere, or blasting it all over the place, knowing that it could hurt.”
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