As a family of three now (after losing two 18-year-old boys), we were in our living room with the TV on in the background when we first heard of the sickening blow to Andy Brayshaw delivered by Andrew Gaff.
The incident has been played over and over again. My first instinct is to think, “What effect does this have on impressionable children who are watching – a motionless player alone on the field with blood pouring out of his mouth from the impact – let alone the rest of us? Does it normalise violence? I wonder how it affects all of our state of minds?” I don’t need to answer my own questions – I already know the answers.
Replay
In order to protect ourselves from the loss of our son and brother Thomas from a coward punch in 2012, we try to do all we can to enact self-preservation when it comes to hearing about violence such as this – as well as domestic violence. We try to distance ourselves from contact with it.
But incidents like this cut through what we think is our impenetrable iron jacket like a hot knife through butter, leaving behind a sick feeling in the pit of your stomach. The quietness of our family's new “normal” is shattered as another young person is senselessly struck.
There is a deafening silence in the room as each of us tries to take in what we have just witnessed, knowing that we will never understand why some choose to inflict so much pain on innocent victims.
One by one, we all come to the same conclusion – NO, this is NOT right. This act should never be tolerated.
Players must understand that their behaviour goes well beyond the boundaries of the stadium; it transverses a whole community. Violence is a hot topic of discussion – with thousands falling victim yearly. If we want change, then it must be at all levels – including sport.
Fremantle Docker Andrew Brayshaw receives treatment after Andrew Gaff’s behind-play punch.
We know from our own experience that the severe immediate impact and longer-term consequences of that punch will change the young lives of both players – it will do so emotionally, physically and mentally.
Professional elite sports players need to come to the intellectual understanding, even if they don’t care on an emotional level, that young people who watch them at the game, on television or on social media may emulate the "masculinity" they display. They may do it on a sports field or on their partner at home or on a complete stranger, as in Thomas’ case, with devastating consequences.
Thomas Kelly died as a result of a punch to his head in 2012.
As a society, we have a right to demand a call for change to public (and non-public) displays of violence, otherwise how will we leave the next generation, our own sons and daughters, in a better place to live?
It’s now up to the AFL tribunal to make a decision – let’s hope that its members are also thinking about the longer term impact on all Australians as any good to come from this should be a defining moment.
Ralph Kelly is the founder and director of the Thomas Kelly Youth Foundation.
Source: Read Full Article