Royal Mail strikes leave kinky sex-starved Brits dildo-less at Christmas

The Royal Mail postal strikes are hitting Brits hard in a way you might not expect.

Horny shoppers have been left without their kinky Christmas presents, after several strikes over the next week take place, on top of ones already completed.

But according to the owner of sex toy company GetFruityCo.com, post offices around the country are now piled high with rampant rabbits and dildos with nobody around the deliver them.

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Owner Adam Wright said that he currently has hundreds of dildos and other sex toys stuck in sorting offices and his warehouses awaiting delivery.

He explained: “To call it a balls up would be an understatement.

“Orders have been flying in since September and we've been running a 24/7 operation to get them out.

“We've done our best to make hay while the sun shines and get everything out as quickly as possible, but the strikes are really affecting my business through no fault of my own.

“We're also providing an essential service in my view. Some people say sex is a human right and what gives people more pleasure than being able to climax?

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“If it isn't resolved pretty soon there will be hundreds if not thousands of sex-starved Brits this Christmas.

“That's not really in keeping with the festive spirit.”

The walkouts – triggered in a dispute over pay, jobs and conditions – coincide with the busiest time of year for Royal Mail when people and businesses are sending Christmas cards and presents.

Confirmed strike dates, as well as today, are Thursday (December 15), next week on Friday (December 23) and Saturday (December 24).

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A Royal Mail spokesman said: “Royal Mail has well-developed contingency plans, but we cannot fully replace the daily efforts of our frontline workforce.

“We’ll be doing what we can to keep services running, but we are sorry this planned strike action is likely to cause you some disruption.”

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