Mother who invited her colleague to join her relationship with her husband reveals they’re planning a three-way commitment ceremony – and insists their bond is built on love and not sex
- Kat, 29, and Justin Taddei, 38, of Idaho, have been married for almost ten years
- Then a year ago, Kat asked her colleague Nikki Mattoon to join their relationship
- Trio have been living together for the last year – along with the couple’s children
- And now, they intend to have a commitment ceremony – similar to a marriage
A mother-of-four who invited a work colleague to sleep with her husband has revealed that they are now planning a ‘commitment ceremony’ to each other.
Kat, 29, and Justin Taddei, 38, from Idaho, were happily married for almost ten years when 12 months ago, the former call center operator asked her colleague Nikki Mattoon, 28, to join their relationship.
Although Kat and Justin had previously spoken about polyamory in the past, they didn’t think it was plausible until they met Nikki, who identifies as bisexual.
They invited Nikki over for dinner one evening, and since then she’s ‘never left’.
The trio have been happily living together for the last year – along with the married couple’s four children, Jean, 12, Alexis, eight, Portia, seven, and Marcus, four.
And now, they intend to have a three-way commitment ceremony on Kat and Justin’s tenth wedding anniversary next year.
Kat (pictured center), 29, and Justin Taddei (left), 38, from Idaho, were happily married for almost ten years when her colleague Nikki Mattoon (right), 28, joined their relationship
The trio have been happily living together for the last year – along with three of the married couple’s four children, Alexis, eight, Portia, seven, and Marcus, four (pictured together)
Stay-at-home mother Kat said: ‘We are planning a commitment ceremony next year when it will be mine and Justin’s ten year anniversary – her first year and our tenth year.
‘We wanted to use this date because it was already important and meaningful to Justin and I, and now it will be for us three.’
She added: ‘It might not be a lifestyle that suits everyone, but it works for us and I can’t wait to have a husband and a wife.’
Speaking about other people’s reactions to their polyamorous relationship, Kat said: ‘I posted a thing on Facebook to let everyone know what was going on and everybody’s response was “if you are happy, we’re happy”. Everyone was super supportive.
The trio (pictured) now intend to have a three-way commitment ceremony on Kat and Justin’s tenth wedding anniversary next year
Nikki and Kat (pictured left and right) try on wedding dresses together ahead of their nuptials next year
‘We didn’t expect it, but everything clicked at the right time – it was just natural for us. We are not saying others should follow our example, just not to criticise us.’
Kat – who identifies as bisexual – met Nikki when they both worked in a call center and invited her for dinner over Christmas time.
She introduced her to Justin and ‘since then she’s never left’.
Kat explained: ‘There wasn’t really a conversation between me and Justin beforehand, it was more like, “so this is happening, are you OK with it?”.
‘It was more like, “I want to be myself, I don’t want to hide the fact that I am bisexual from anybody”.
Justin, Nikki, and Kat pose in the sun together. The three of them share the same bed in their home
Justin, Nikki, and Kat (pictured right) all wear engagement rings (pictured left) with each others’ names on
‘I like girls and guys and I think I should have the opportunity to have both – why should I have to conform to society’s idea of one person to be in love with?
‘We really want other people to know it’s not about sex, because we get asked that a lot. It’s not a sex thing, it’s a love thing.’
Justin added: ‘We spoke and researched about polyamory before, but we never actually pursued it and when our relationship happened, it was all accidental and natural. We didn’t expect it, everything worked and clicked at the right time.
‘Nikki and I clicked right away, we are very similar people in a lot of aspects like our views and things we find funny, our mannerisms, so we clicked right away.
‘I’ve always supported Kat no matter what it was, I always knew she was bisexual and if there was something she wanted to do that was going to make her happy, I was going to support her 100 per cent.’
Husband and wife Kat and Justin Taddei and their children Alexis, eight, Portia, seven, and Marcus, four, with their partner, Nikki
It wasn’t always smooth sailing for the ‘throuple’ (pictured in fancy dress costume, left), with Kat admitting that there were some feelings of jealousy at the start. Pictured right: The family altogether
Kat has always been honest with her children from the beginning and they think the ceremony is an ‘awesome’ idea.
The mother, who met Justin in culinary school in 2009 before getting married a year later, said: ‘I’ve always been very open with my kids and when we told them Nikki would be moving in with us it didn’t even faze them.
‘We told them we were going to marry Nikki and they told us: “That’s awesome!” and wanted to be flower girls.
‘They are really excited about the wedding, they just see Nikki as one more person to love them.’
The threesome share one king-size bed in their home to avoid any of them feeling left out – but there is a separate room if one of the three need some space.
The trio’s engagement rings, pictured. Kat has always been honest with her children from the beginning and they think the ceremony is an ‘awesome’ idea
Husband and wife Kat and Justin asked their partner, Nikki, to marry them using an engraving on their cat’s collar
Explaining how they make their setup work, Kat added: ‘The best way for a polyamorous relationship to work is with open communication.
‘If one of us is upset, no matter whose feelings it might hurt, we talk about it – we don’t keep it inside. That just makes it cluster and then it turns into a big bomb and nobody’s happy.’
Nikki, who revealed she has ‘very different friendships with both of them’, couldn’t hide her excitement for their upcoming commitment ceremony – similar to a marriage.
‘It’s been really special to plan a wedding with two other people,’ she said. ‘We found the dresses we love. We probably put on 30 dresses between us two first.
A drawing depicting the family altogether – including Nikki, Kat, and Justin – by daughter Portia
‘Planning the wedding, it’s been something. Kat is completely out there and I’m more traditional in a sense.
‘She was talking about doing a Game of Thrones theme and I’m over here with the Country theme. In the end, she let me decide as this is my first time getting married.’
But it wasn’t always smooth sailing for the ‘throuple’, with Kat admitting that there were some feelings of jealousy at the start.
Nikki also confessed to feeling ‘a bit left out at first, because Justin and Kat have their own way of communication’.
‘It took a while for me to realise I’m not just this third person and I can be involved in all the conversations,’ she said.
While the biggest challenge for Justin is making sure he spends time with both of them equally.
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