Having relationships with people is fundamental to our well-being, but there are different types – and it can be hard to define them.
There are those that will change your life forever, and then there are those that seem incredibly important while you’re in them but that, once over, fade away until you can’t remember why you were with the person to begin with.
Perhaps you’re just f***-buddies or it’s a casual fling that you both know won’t last in the long-run – or maybe you’re a polyamorous couple, enjoying several romantic connections with more than person at one time.
One relationship type that is less spoken about is the ‘karmic relationship’.
You might never have heard the term, but the scenario is actually quite common. Fundamentally, it’s a passionate yet inherently difficult relationship that you have to work really, really hard to maintain.
So much so that you’re not sure it’s worth pursuing – even though you’re madly in love – and it will teach you important lessons about love.
Here are the signs that you’re in a karmic relationship.
It makes you feel like you’re on an emotional rollercoaster
Are you happy one day but miserable the next? Does this keep happening week after week?
A karmic relationship will draw you in so deep that anything that rocks the boat, even a minor argument, will feel like a massive issue that upends your entire world.
You have an instant connection with the other person
People often talk about a having an instant connection, but this isn’t the kind you see on Love Island.
This is a life-altering, deep down in your bones, meant-to-be kind of spark. More often than not, people in karmic relationships are also very attracted to each other from the word go.
While you can absolutely fall head over heels for someone straight away, love takes time to develop. What you’re feeling is most likely extreme lust, and it’s important to know the difference.
There are problems early on
This goes beyond fighting about what to have for dinner; if one person is more dominant than the other, or you are constantly fighting and then making up, it’s possible you’re in a karmic relationship.
This can also appear in the form of your partner being controlling, obsessive or just plain mean.
As a side note, remember that controlling behaviour is also a warning sign of an abusive partner, so be careful and consider whether this is a bigger issue that you should deal with now, before things get worse.
Arguing is normal, but a loving partner will never make you feel bad about yourself.
It’s very hard to end the relationship, even if you want to
You’re on again, you’re off again – over and over and over.
One or both of you might want out of the relationship, and yet you can’t resist staying (or getting back together). You’re like magnets.
You might feel addicted to the relationship or dependent on the other person and your connection to them. Some people also feel afraid of what will happen and who they will become once the relationship is over.
Your partner is selfish and not interested in your needs
They want to go out, so you do. They want to stay at home, so you do. They want you to jump up and down while holding a teacup, so you do.
OK, the last example is extreme, but the point is that karmic relationships usually rely on a delicate balance of one person being self-serving and the other doing whatever they can to keep them happy.
You don’t feel secure in the relationship
A healthy relationship makes you feel safe, loved and cared for.
If you’re worrying about the state of your relationship or are always concerned that it will end and that your partner will leave you, it’s karmic.
The relationship is doomed to end
There are exceptions to every rule, but karmic relationships will usually end.
It’s fiery and exciting whenever you’re together, but like a volcano, you never know when your connection will erupt and destroy everything.
Karmic relationships are far too tumultuous to be maintainable, but you learn from them and move on – which is exactly what they are there for.
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