Dealing with loss can be devastating. But dealing with the loss of a child can be life destroying. Rob Delaney from Catastrophe recently opened up about the death of his two-year-old son Henry to give others hope and offer the support many grieving parents need.
He tweeted about the interview with the Evening Standard, plus why he was so candid about what he and his family face.
Delaney faced a parent’s worst nightmare
In January last year, Delaney’s son died after battling a brain tumor. He told the Evening Standard the pain from his loss continues to be real every day. “I’m a mess. My child died 14 months ago and I’m basically a bag of wet rubbish. I need a lot of help. It has been very hard. It comes in waves. I’ve learned to not control how the waves come. Right now I’m sad a lot.”
He recounted the pain he and his family endured. “We were at Great Ormond Street Hospital for seven months, and then we were at our local hospital for seven months, and then we were home with Henry for seven months, and then he died.”
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Delaney also credits support his family received from Rainbow Trust, an organization that helps families with critically ill children. He recounts how his caseworker, Fiona could not have been more amazing throughout the horrible ordeal. “
“At that point, we didn’t know Henry was going to die. We knew he was disabled by his tumour and his surgery. Fiona was like a paratrooper who just drops in and has the skill set to help people in unbelievable pain and fear.”
But this is why Delaney wanted to discuss his pain
He also took to Twitter to explain why he went public about what he and his family were enduring. He first wanted to support and draw attention to the Rainbow Trust. “Our family support worker has helped us more than I can say. If you’d like to help families with very sick kids, Rainbow Trust is where it’s at,” he tweeted.
He also wanted people to know where his head was, especially as he moved forward as a professional. “Big reason I posted that is because even though I’m pulling my weight professionally, doing a good job at work etc, I still worry ppl could think I’m not ‘up to the task’ or my grief could be inconvenient for them & then I’d wind up unable to provide for my family,” he continued.
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“As it was I had to (or rather *could afford to*) turn down several jobs while caring for Henry & just after he died,” he added. “I tell my story & express my fears because those fears are far greater & more justified for ppl less materially fortunate than me.”
He also wants people to know this
Delaney ended his Twitter thread with, “Finally, don’t be afraid of grieving people. Like it or not, we know something you will one day learn. We’re good for you!”
Following the thread came an outpouring of understanding and support. Actor Nick Offerman wrote, “Thank you Rob.” And Delaney responded, “You met our little man…” Others shared similar stories of battles and loss.
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One follower commented, “My sister died of a brain tumor 15 yrs ago when she was 7 & I was 9. Now that I’m an adult & can process everything, I am more a wreck than ever. I can’t mention her name or hear a sad song without becoming a puddle. But the pain let’s me know I still can see her. Thank you!!”
Others thanked Delaney for starting the conversation, including Dr. Drew Pinsky. “I had no idea. It takes my breath away to think about what you must be experiencing,” he wrote. “Thank you for creating literally a thread of support for others by posting this. Perhaps a small crutch to assist with the labyrinth that is grief. I am so sorry.”
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