TV presenter Declan Donnelly is, as always, right.
“No one tells you how hard being a parent is! We could have had a warning! It’s literally the hardest thing ever I’ve done, but I’m loving it!” he said recently when interviewed about his new parenting status.
Well said Dec! I totally agree! Parenting is the hardest thing I’ve ever done, too! Nothing even comes close. I’m serious. Brain surgery, fiddling with Rubik’s Cubes, enduring a minute in Gemma Collins’ presence – I’m sure they’re all a breeze compared to parenting.
Say it Loud
As a parent, it’s great to hear someone with Dec’s profile come out and say what we’re all thinking: PARENTING IS HARD. SO HARD.
Too often the media is filled with celebrity parents blabbing on about how ‘spiritual’ and ‘life affirming’ being a mum or dad is. Parenting may well be both those things, but it’s also tiring, messy, emotional and unforgiving – so it’s great to hear Dec speak honestly about his experience.
Parenting cracked
Despite all this, niine months ago, I thought I’d got the whole ‘parenting thing’ cracked. I’d got the ‘knack’ of everything and mastered life as a stay at home dad to a toddler. In my more smug moments I used to think I should get the people from The Guinness Book of Records around to time my nappy changes – the skills I had in that department were THAT good. I thought I could do it all. So, in this naivety, I welcomed the idea of having a second kid. It would be easy, wouldn’t it? WRONG!
The arrival of a second child takes parenting to a completely different level of difficulty. Sorry to say this Dec, having one kid is HARD, but two is SO MUCH HARDER.
1000 times more difficult – or so it seems.
Rose-tinted glasses
When my first child was a new born, life seemed a never-ending cycle of nappy changes, feeds and crying. It was much harder than I expected – although this makes me wonder what exactly I’d (rather stupidly) expected. The thing is, looking back on that time now, it all seems like a walk in the park. Yes, I know I’m wearing rose-tinted glasses, but, right now, having just one baby seems simple.
DÉJÀ VU
The arrival of my daughter, around a month ago has given me the strangest sense of Déjà vu. I feel like I’ve done all of this before, but it was all A LOT easier first time around.
Let me explain:
- Feeding the baby: It’s all very familiar. But first time around we didn’t have a possessive toddler constantly wanting to get involved. A jealous tot, prone to screaming and the throwing of toys, makes life more than a little tricky second time around.
- Nappy changes: It’s well-trodden territory. But first time around a little voice wasn’t constantly asking ‘What are you doing?’ or demanding to have their nappy changed too. In comparison, the nappy changes of old seem blissfully relaxed.
- Getting baby to sleep: It’s a high wire act, of rocking, cooing and crossing your fingers. These days, however, there’s the new (ever-present) threat of an excitable tot jumping out and screaming at the baby as soon as she settles.
You get the idea.
Premier League
Don’t get me wrong. The arrival of my daughter is a joyful thing. It’s wonderful. But dealing with a new born AND a toddler is almost impossibly difficult. Parents of three children (or more) I salute you, you have my admiration – I simply don’t know how you do it! Right now, I feel like someone who was quite good at Sunday morning football suddenly expected to keep up with the best in the Premier League.
It’s more than a little tricky.
I’m amazed I’ve had the time or the brainpower to write this – fighting the desire to sleep as I type.
Next time
I’m so pleased that Declan Donnelly has been honest about how exhausting parenting is. He also said that he was ‘loving’ the process – something I’d agree with him about, most of the time. I can only hope that if the Donnellys are blessed with baby #2, Dec will be just as honest – admitting (as I have) that baby #1 was (in comparison) a walk in the park.
Chris McGuire is a writer and stay at home dad to his two children, he blogs as ‘The Out Of Depth Dad’. For more from Chris visit Outofdepthdad.com or follow him at Twitter.com/Outofdepth_dad or Instagram.com/Outofdepthdad.
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