Katy Perry is excitedly awaiting the arrival of her baby girl with fiancé Orlando Bloom, but it wasn't until recently that the singer felt ready for motherhood.
"I was really terrified of the idea two or three years ago. It was just like, I don't know how I'm ever gonna do that. That's crazy. I can barely take care of myself!" she tells PEOPLE in its latest cover story.
But after undergoing the Hoffman Process — a weeklong retreat that helps participants dig into negative behaviors conditioned from childhood — during a deep depression over the last several years, Perry says she felt a shift.
"It changed my life, and it's changed Orlando's life and many of my friends' lives," she says. "It helped me re-wire how I think about myself and the habits and patterns of why I do something. It's just given me a lot more freedom."
Now, the American Idol judge, 35, says she's no longer "scared" to bring a child into the world.
It may come as a surprise to fans who embrace Perry for her quirky humor and larger-than-life personality, but the pop star is convinced she will be the disciplinarian.
"[Orlando]'s gonna be the good cop and I'm gonna be the bad cop. I already know it!" she says. "I'm the three F's. I'm fun, firm but fair. That's how I roll."
Looking back on her journey to motherhood, Perry says it was all meant to be.
"My blessing in all of what I went through is that I just feel like I have a bigger, more dimensional life. I get to live life and I get to bring life into the world," she says. "I am glad [a daughter] is in the cards for me."
For all the details on how Katy Perry is preparing for motherhood, her life with Orlando Bloom and the strength and joy behind her upcoming album, Smile, pick up the latest issue of PEOPLE, on newsstands Friday.
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