Getting into the car with a kid for a drive to the grocery store is enough to get our blood pressure rising. Of course you need food and of course you and your kiddo could use some fresh air, but getting them out of the house and into their seat is such a pain. No matter how perfectly you think you’ve placed them in their car seat, their straps are somehow nowhere in sight, entirely smooshed underneath their little tush. And once you wriggle the straps free, you have a cranky kiddo because, yeah, it must be annoying to have someone jostle you around looking for some straps and then almost pinch your leg while buckling you in. And then there’s the whining until you find the perfect song to listen to for the two-minute drive.
It’s…a lot. But we would do that drive over and over and over again if it meant avoiding the 2-hour road trip that Andy Cohen just took with his son, Benjamin, 4 and his daughter Lucy, 1.
The Bravo host took to his Instagram story on Sunday and shared a selfie video of him driving while his kids cried nonstop from the backseat. Cohen looked utterly defeated we (unfortunately) know his pain. “We’re almost there, just two more hours,” he told them with the least enthusiastic voice we’ve ever heard.
But have no fear! Ben knew just how to get his dad through this.
There really is just one thing Cohen had to do, and he should consider himself lucky for having a 4-year-old who was able to remind him:
“Daddy,” Benjamin called from the backseat. “Yeah?” Cohen asked, sighing.
“Take a chill pill.”
Take. A. Chill. Pill. DUH! Cohen, c’mon, how did you not think of that?!
“I would like a chill pill to be honest,” the dad of two said, nodding as he considered his son’s advice. “It would help me out a lot right now.”
But of course, as soon as Cohen might have thought things were looking up, Benjamin threw him a curve ball.
The little boy was quick to point out a major problem that could impact the trip and his dad’s ability to secure a chill pill.
“Wait you have to poop in your pants!” Benjamin said.
“I have to poop in my pants? Well, that’s the only thing that could make this drive more annoying is if I pooped in my pants,” Cohen said in that same monotonous and relatable voice he’d been using from the start.
“But no one is gonna clean it up,” Benjamin said, no doubt repeating a phrase he’d heard while potty training.
“No, I’ll have to,” Cohen agreed. “I clean up poo for a living.”
Because from being a single dad to hosting reunion episodes of tv shows on Bravo, he really does “clean up poo for a living.”
Ben’s Other Talents
Cohen’s son isn’t only good at giving advice and anticipating potty-related accidents. He’s also very perceptive. Ben — who is good friends with Anderson Cooper’s son Wyatt, 3 and has another friend with gay dads — has told Cohen he “wants another daddy.”
“It’s so cool to me that he knows that it would be a daddy,” Cohen joked at New York City’s 92NY event (per People), “My son has excellent gaydar, what can I say?”
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