HOLLY Hagan has revealed that she "risked her life and made herself sick" as she battled to be thing after being called a "fat s**g".
The 27-year-old star shot to fame when she joined MTV show Geordie Shore in 2011, and has opened up about being branded "the fat one" in the cast.
Taking to her Instagram account, Holly shared two photos of herself showing off her enviable figure in a sports bra and leggings.
Her toned stomach and muscular arms are proudly on display as she bravely spoke out on her weight loss journey.
She captioned the snaps: "Most of you will of followed my journey, being 'the fat one' from Geordie Shore. The majority of my late teens was spent trying desperately to lose weight for the approval of others.
"My reason.. If all everyone calls me is fat maybe if I’m slim they’ll stop…. it wasn’t until years later I realised it didn’t matter what weight I was, the trolls were going to find something to call me.
Most of you will of followed my journey, being “the fat one” from Geordie Shore. The majority of my late teens was spent trying desperately to lose weight for the approval of others. My reason.. if all everyone calls me is fat maybe if I’m slim they’ll stop…. it wasn’t until years later I realised it didn’t matter what weight I was the trolls were going to find something to call me. My weight was never the issue, they were the issue. But by then the damage was done. I spent years of my life trying every single diet fad in the hope of finding “the secret”. I tried the teas the coffees the carb blockers, drinking nothing but water and cayenne pepper DESPERATELY trying to be thin. I would resort to making myself sick, fat freezing and eventually I would risk my life on an operating table because I genuinely believed there was no other option.I just wanted the abuse to stop. But it didn’t stop it went from “fat slag” to “too much surgery looked better before” “you’re the reason our children feel under pressure to get surgery” “what has she done to herself she looks horrendous” … you can’t abuse someone for the way they look for 8 years and then be shocked when they succumb to the pressure.I still wasn’t happy. I was still gaining weight and unable to control it. I still didn’t like my body. I felt lazy, anxious, fed up and then I came across @real_life_health_and_fitness I did everything he said. He made me eat 5 huge meals a day, more food than I’ve ever eaten. I had pancakes, cocopops, bread NOTHING was off limits. I trained HARD and I mean you’ve seen the IGTV videos ? That is what it takes. Consistency. I couldn’t believe I looked like that when I seen the photos (keep in mind I am tensing and posing) but I couldn’t even do 1 press up and now I can do 20 ? I feel so determined to be the best version of me. Who has a healthy relationship with food and exercise. Who doesn’t just go to the gym to try and lose weight but to improve fitness and health. I finally feel in control. For me and nobody else ✨ . . . Photo cred – @petebennettphotographer
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"My weight was never the issue, they were the issue. But by then the damage was done."
Holly continued: "I spent years of my life trying every single diet fad in the hope of finding 'the secret'.
"I tried the teas, the coffees the carb blockers, drinking nothing but water and cayenne pepper DESPERATELY trying to be thin.
"I would resort to making myself sick, fat freezing and eventually I would risk my life on an operating table because I genuinely believed there was no other option."
However, the cruel trolls continued after the reality star had cosmetic surgery, with the Newcastle beauty adding: "I just wanted the abuse to stop.
"But it didn’t stop, it went from 'fat slag' to 'too much surgery, looked better before', 'you’re the reason our children feel under pressure to get surgery', 'what has she done to herself she looks horrendous'.
"…You can’t abuse someone for the way they look for 8 years and then be shocked when they succumb to the pressure.
"I still wasn’t happy. I was still gaining weight and unable to control it. I still didn’t like my body."
Holly went on to credit her personal trainer for drastically improving her lifestyle – revealing that he had her eating five "huge" meals a day while training "hard".
Addressing the enviable photos that she had posted, she gushed: "I couldn’t believe I looked like that when I seen the photos (keep in mind I am tensing and posing) but I couldn’t even do one press-up and now I can do 20.
"I feel so determined to be the best version of me.
"Who has a healthy relationship with food and exercise. Who doesn’t just go to the gym to try and lose weight but to improve fitness and health. I finally feel in control. For me and nobody else."
Holly was inundated with praise from her impressed followers, who thanked her for speaking so openly about her body image battle.
One wrote: "Well done Hol, you look unreal!! Smashed it."
Another commented: "Well said lovley lady, you really are an inspiration to me and for others."
A third said: "Well done Holly, you're amazing inside and out."
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