Lauren had driven from her home in Torquay to visit her mum Sarah*, then 46, in Bournemouth when she started feeling so exhausted she could barely hold her head up.
She suspected a urinary tract infection and visited the doctor, who did a pregnancy test. It was positive.
Lauren, now 34, said: "I was in shock about the pregnancy. Then, four days after I found out, I was suddenly sick on the bedroom floor."
Next morning, simply rolling over in bed made her sick again. "I was throwing up continuously," she recalled. "By the first week of sickness it was happening 15 times a day."
Along with nausea and vomiting, Lauren suffered from debilitating dizziness. Blood tests revealed that her hormone levels were double that of a usual pregnancy.
Two days on she was admitted to hospital and put on IV fluids. "I couldn’t think straight," she admitted. "The lights, noise and smells there made me feel really rough. I was crying a lot and I’m not a crier. I discharged myself after six hours."
From then on, Lauren endured the torture from the bedroom at her mum’s cottage. Unable to eat or get out of bed, she had to give up her job at an interiors shop.
At the time, she’d never heard of hyperemesis gravidarum (HG), which is the same extreme morning sickness Kate Middleton suffered from.
"My mind was racing," she recalled. "Was this going to last for the full nine months? What will I do with the baby at the end? I felt like I was dying and I just wanted it to end."
Joe visited and when he saw how ill she was he supported Lauren’s decision to have a termination.
Lauren made an appointment with BPAS, the British Pregnancy Advisory Service.
"It’s awful but I felt like there was no option," Lauren said. "I went in with my sick bowl and didn’t look at anyone."
Lauren was 10 weeks pregnant when she was given a tablet to swallow, then three further tablets to take by putting them on a tampon to terminate the pregnancy.
I felt like I was dying and I just wanted it to end
Within hours of taking the first tablet she began to feel less queasy.
"At first the relief outweighed the remorse," she admitted. "When I started to feel guilty I’d brush it under the carpet but occasionally I’d lie in bed and it would come to me.
"I didn’t want to open the floodgates so I locked it away. I didn’t think I could live with the guilt."
Afterwards, keeping busy with a job at a taxi rank, and Googling pregnancy sickness, adoption and surrogacy, she didn’t let herself think about the termination.
What is hyperemesis gravidarum?
Hyperemesis gravidarum (HG) is much worse than the normal morning sickness experienced during pregnancy.
Unlike regular pregnancy sickness, HG may not get better by 14 weeks and for many needs hospital treatment.
Sufferers may be sick numerous times each day and be unable to keep food or drink down, which can massively impact their everyday life.
Symptoms include:
- prolonged nausea and vomiting with some women being sick up to 50 times a day
- weight loss
- dehydration – sufferers can’t keep fluids down, if you're drinking less than 500ml a day, the NHS recommends you seek help
- ketosis – a serious condition that results in the build-up of acidic chemicals in the blood and urine
- low blood pressure (hypotension) when standing
Sickness may not clear up completely until the baby is born, although some symptoms can improve at around 20 weeks.
HG is unlikely to harm your baby, but can cause you to lose weight during your pregnancy, so there is an increase in chance your baby will weigh less than expected.
If you are experiencing severe nausea and vomiting you should see a GP or midwife before you start suffering from dehydration and weight loss.
She read up on HG and a new drug that could help sufferers, which gave her hope she could carry a child in future.
Lauren and Joe, who has two children from a previous relationship, married in July 2010 and shortly afterwards she stopped taking the pill.
A month later she was pregnant again and the sickness began within days.
"I was 26," she explained. "I knew I was young enough to cope with the illness and I wanted the baby badly enough to do it."
Only it was worse this time. Lauren vomited a minimum of 15 times a day and she’d even get up in the night to be sick.
"It was evil," she said. "For six weeks I didn’t eat and hardly drank. I slept in the loft conversion of our two-bedroom flat with the skylight open to get fresh air in. When I woke in the mornings there was frost on the duvet."
Doctors told Lauren the HG medication she’d heard about was too expensive to be subscribed on the NHS, so at eight weeks she was given a generic anti-sickness medication.
When she took it, it only stopped the vomiting, not the intense nausea, exhaustion and dizziness.
"At least when I’d been sick I’d had a few moments of relief," she said.
Lauren lost 2st 7lb during this time. The long, dark hair around her temples fell out in clumps and she couldn’t get out of bed, let alone wash or brush her teeth.
"I thought about not going through with it," she admitted. "But there was no way I was going to do that again."
At 18 weeks Lauren started to improve. She was still nauseous and sick every day, but could nibble on almonds and tinned mandarins.
Finally, at 27 weeks, the sickness stopped. Her healthy daughter, Rebecca, was born at 39 weeks weighing 6lb 11oz, with a mop of dark hair.
While she was elated to have finally become a mum, looking at her perfect baby meant the reality of her termination years before painfully hit home.
"When you’ve had a child, it makes you realise what you’ve done," Lauren explained.
The HG had taken its toll. One of Lauren’s left molars had broken during pregnancy and two more shortly after Rebecca was born. She lost all three teeth.
Her gall bladder was damaged too, and doctors removed it when Rebecca was just six weeks old. Now Lauren says she’ll never have another baby.
"I have really bad health anxiety," she explained. "I had CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) two years ago and it helped but I’m afraid of getting pregnant.
"My daughter is everything to me but I never want to feel that way again. Ever.
"The way I cope is to just not think about it. I’ll never be the same again."
*Joe, Sarah and Rebecca are false names.
The Duchess of Cambridge has experienced hyperemesis gravidarum in all three of her pregnancies.
Lauren received help from the charity Pregnancy Sickness Support, which is working to improve care, treatment and support for women suffering from Nausea and Vomiting in Pregnancy (NVP) and Hyperemesis Gravidarum (HG), the severe form of the condition.
The organisation relies on donations – if you wish to donate or get involved, visit pregnancysicknesssupport.org.uk.
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