Kevin Hart is probably not visiting a zoo anytime soon.
Cohosting The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon on Wednesday, the Night School actor was not having it when Robert Irwin — the 14-year-old son of the late Steve Irwin — brought animals to the set.
Robert, who is returning to Animal Planet with his family in Crikey! It’s the Irwins, began the segment with a 2-month-old ostrich named Giselle. “I’m starting off with something very cute and cuddly,” he enthused.
Hart, 39, did not agree. Jumping up, he exclaimed, “You can kiss my ass.”
As Robert gushed about Giselle’s chirping, Hart replied, “You know what she’s saying? ‘I want some little black man.’ That’s what she’s saying.”
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Robert explained that ostriches like Giselle can grow up to run 40 miles per hour. “At this time, I want to say, I will not be the fastest thing running,” Hart joked.
Robert’s fun fact that ostrich legs can “easily kill a lion” did not amuse Hart either — he stared at the camera with a petrified look as the audience roared. “You can put that one back,” he said.
Next up were snakes named LeBron and Elvis. “No, stay Kevin, no. We’re in this together man,” Fallon, who was celebrating his birthday, said as Hart tried to run. “Kevin, you have to just get over your fears, and you have to hold the snake.”
“It ain’t gonna happen,” Hart answered.
Even the audience chanting his name could not persuade him. “Let me tell you what I’ve gotten really good at in my life,” Hart said. “Saying no.”
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He started to reconsider. “Do they bite?” he asked.
“Well, they can bite, but they won’t,” Robert said.
Hart quipped, “You lost me at ‘well.’”
It was a lot for Hart to handle. “My ass is sweating, Jimmy,” he said. “I’m being 100 percent honest. I got so much sweat dripping down my ass right now.”
Fallon urged him to close his eyes and put his hands out. “This is how black people die in a horror movie,” Hart said.
Robert’s third visitor was a red knee tarantula. Though Fallon initially tried to climb up the wall of the studio, he held the tarantula in the end. Hart screamed, “I’m nervous for you.”
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“As long as you don’t breathe on it, you’ll be fine,” Robert said as Hart yelled to unsettle it.
The last animal was a falcon named Squire, who landed on Fallon’s, Robert’s and Hart’s arms. “Jimmy, get it!” Hart ordered.
Night School hits theaters on Sept. 28.
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