DEAR DEIDRE: DESPITE me wanting sex, my husband refuses – simply saying “it” won’t work any more.
He insists he still loves me and finds me attractive but he just cannot get an erection. He gives me nothing but a kiss on the forehead before he leaves the house for work or goes to bed at night.
He says if he does any more than that, I will expect sex he can’t provide. I’m 41 and he is 44. I love him with all my heart.
I long to be kissed and cuddled like a woman should be.
I long for that skin-on-skin contact but he doesn’t come near me. He has been to the doctor several times but they just said it is the male menopause or he has a sciatica problem. We want to deal with this without pills if we can.
I know he will become a sexual stranger to me if we can’t sort this out.
DEIDRE SAYS: Back pain can be all-consuming, so ask your GP for a referral to a physiotherapist to sort out the sciatica problem.
Reassure your husband that sex isn’t all about intercourse, as so many men seem to believe.
Say the intimacy of kissing, cuddling and massage would bridge the physical gap that is dangerously opening up between you.
My e-leaflet on Solving Erection Problems explains self-help sex therapy.
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