“I just went through one of the most vulnerable, raw, massive, confusing, just phenomenal experiences that a woman could ever endure,” the actress, 35, said in a Saturday, October 12, Instagram video. “Matthew and I have been so intentionally trying to get pregnant and calling our child … I’m trying to call in my child that I know is waiting for us. And I want to just open my life and my arms to this human. And so on our second cycle of calling this child in, we got pregnant. And it was among just such extraordinary intention and love.”
The Hawaii native continued, “I miscarried. I found out at four weeks and began the cycle of miscarriage on my sixth week and that’s a whole conversation that I would love to have, but the point of today is to tell you how meditation helped guide me through this journey and this experience.”
Renee, who gave birth to her and the Glee star’s 23-month-old son, Revel, in 2017, explained that meditation has given her the ability to “rise above [negative] conditioned thoughts,” such as whether she caused this pregnancy loss or will suffer another one. “I’m just not going to choose to go there,” she said.
The model went on to tell her followers not “to feel sorry” for her. “I don’t feel sorry for myself, and to go through these experiences and to get pregnant and to be alive … to be alive is an accomplishment,” she said. Instead, what Renee is hoping to accomplish with her emotional video is a connection with other women who have also suffered miscarriages.
“Women, I want you to know that I feel you,” she said. “And, God, you are goddesses. And we all deserve so much acknowledgment and love and support and encouragement. That’s what I’m here to help us accomplish through sharing my story, my vulnerability, and just to say that I see you. I see you and I feel you, and we are Members Only. … [Let’s] step back from the fear we are putting ourselves in and the disconnection and the shame.”
Renee and the actor, 40, tied the knot in 2014.
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