It might be safe to assume that when you get engaged to someone, you know pretty much everything there is to know about them – their likes and dislikes, what they want for the future, all the important stuff.
Of course everyone has a secret or two of their own, but it’s not typically something that will tear a relationship apart.
Claire Dalton, however was shocked to discover that her fiancé had a big secret that he’d been keeping from her during their four year relationship.
And it caused her to call off their wedding, one week before the big day.
In a blog post written for Love What Matters , 21-year-old Claire revealed that since she was a young girl she had been dreaming of a love that was "true and pure" and "governed by God’s law".
This is what she thought she’d found with her fiancé.
But then one night, about a week before the ceremony, she stumbled across something shocking on her partner’s phone.
He’d been looking for pornography just hours before and had "multiple windows open of sick and twisted ideas of what women supposedly look like".
Claire was devastated and once he admitted he had a problem, she decided to call off the wedding .
She said: "I felt like I’d been cheated on. It changed my entire relationship with him, including all the happy memories we had shared in the past. It made me feel worthless and unlovable."
However it wasn’t just her fiancé’s porn addiction that caused a problem- it was the realisation that he’d been lying about watching it for years.
Claire added: "Someone I loved and cared for deeply had been expertly lying to me for the entire length of our relationship, and possibly longer, since we had been friends for so long.
"All at once, I was with a stranger instead of the person I thought I knew so well. In an instant I could never trust those lying eyes ever again.
"All I ever wanted in a relationship was honesty, and it quickly occurred to me the only honesty I’d known at that point was fake."
Claire found out the truth about her partner’s dirty secret a year ago and has finally reached a place where she’s ready to talk about her experience, to help others who may find themselves in a similar situation.
In her blog post she wrote: "Experiences like this MUST BE TALKED ABOUT because keeping quiet only leaves deeper wounds and undeniable scars.
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"My hope is that someone who reads this knows she’s not the first one to go through something similar, and it’s okay to hurt for a long long time. It’s okay to take time to grieve. It’s okay to feel broken. And there IS HOPE FOR HEALING."
But before she reached this point, Claire struggled with her feelings.
"I woke up every morning thinking maybe it was just a sick joke and tomorrow would be better and back to ‘normal’," she said.
"I didn’t know how I was ever going to live my life without him, or without my ‘happy wedding’ going through.
“The thought of opening my heart up to someone again makes me feel sick and panicky.
"I don’t trust people. I just don’t.”
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