What is a sex inventory, you ask? It’s using a list as a way to jump-start a conversation with your partner about your interests and desires when it comes to sex. It’s an easy and surprisingly fun thing to do. First, print out two copies of the list below. Then, give yourselves each ample time on your own to note how you feel about each item on the list and your interest level in that activity.
Finally, set a time and place when and where you can sit down and take the time to compare lists. Now comes the really fun part as you learn where the common ground is and where the great divides remain.
What you do with that info and how you proceed is up to the two of you, of course. But no matter where you are in your relationship from just getting started to being long time partners, every couple needs to do one. Here are seven reasons why it’s time to do a sex inventory with your partner.
Our sex lives evolve
Our brains change over the years, and so do our bodies. It makes sense to regroup on how we have sex as time goes by. And starting off a relationship with an inventory is a great way to have a baseline of sorts for your sexual journey.
Tastes change
The only thing that is for sure is that nothing stays the same. That even applies to what we like — and don’t like — in bed. Tastes can change for all kinds of reasons. The why doesn’t matter as much as respecting what your partner is into right now, always looking forward and never looking back.
There’s always new research
We learn more about sex and our bodies and how they work every day. Heck, it wasn’t until 1998 that the clitoris was fully mapped. So why not benefit from the new info that seems to come out every day? The more we learn, the more we’re likely to be open to new things.
Technology is constantly advancing
There’s no question that sex technology keeps getting better and better — and more and more interesting, too! Doing an inventory can help you take advantage of the new gadgets and gizmos that are appearing on the scene every day. With technology changing, it’s great to have the chance to discover what else we might be into.
Great sex is worth it
You deserve great sex. It’s your birthright. Great sex isn’t generally instant or easy. But it’s always worth it. Taking the time to inventory with your partner is a great investment in your sex life because when it comes to sex, there is nothing better than being on the same page.
It’s a fabulous way to connect with your partner
Actually doing the inventory itself can be a really intimate way to connect with your partner. It opens conversations that you might not otherwise have. And there is something deliciously sexy about having someone to talk about things that you don’t talk about with anyone else in the world. Besides, it’s hard not to get hot and bothered when you’re talking about the things that get you hot and bothered.
It helps you know yourself better
The best partners are the ones who know themselves well enough to know what they like — and don’t like — in bed. You’ll feel better knowing yourself, making you confident in yourself and therefore a better partner. And the same goes for your partner. You want to be with someone who knows what rings her or his bell so that you can get to ringing!
Sex Inventory
You can use this code, as well as additional notes, to mark each topic or activity from O Wow: Discovering Your Ultimate Orgasm.
I – Interested but scared.
N – No way.
Y – Yes, please!
M – More information needed.
Anilingus
Bondage
Daily sex
Dirty talk
Filming your escapades
Fisting
Gender play
Lap dances
Masturbation
Oral sex
Public sex
Quickies
Role playing/Fantasy
Rough play
S&M
Sensory deprivation
Sexting/Phone sex/Video sex
Spanking
Striptease
Threesomes/Group sex/Sex clubs/Sex parties
Toys
Voyeurism
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