WELCOME to Ask Chloe, the no-holds-barred advice column.
Every two weeks, Chloe Madeley answers YOUR sex and relationship questions.
This week she has advice if you are feeling green with envy and says pillow talk is always good, even if the answers are not what you wanted.
Do you have a problem for Chloe? Send them to her here
Q) MY boyfriend of five years is a big man and gets a lot of attention when we are out, as well as on social media.
Sometimes I am not at all bothered by it but at other times I go crazy.
I’m not proud of it, especially as I know he’d never act upon it. I do trust him 100 per cent.
I think my hormones must play a part as, like I say, sometimes I’m really not fazed at all.
So . . . any tips? Thank you.
A) If your boyfriend is attractive and he gets attention, then I completely understand why you sometimes feel possessive.
In my opinion it’s a really good sign – it means you fancy him and he fancies you and you want it to stay that way.
As long as you don’t get down on yourself or make life hard for him, this is just something you will have to sit with and let pass.
I always get jealous when women throw themselves at my husband James.
Actually, “jealous” is the wrong word. I get territorial.
It’s normal and neither of us really care about it, it just happens sometimes.
James, on the other hand, never gets jealous . . . it drives me mad! Because, as I say, I think it can be a really good, healthy sign of togetherness.
I always get jealous when women throw themselves at my husband James
Q) I’VE been with a girl for about three weeks. I’m 29 and she’s 24.
We’ve had sex three times so far, always in the missionary position.
I like foreplay and I told her that – but she says she’s not that into it.
We then started talking about sex positions and I said that I like most, especially doggy style.
But she told me she’s not into that at all.
Then she announced she doesn’t want to carry on seeing me any more.
It came pretty soon after we had the sex conversation and now I feel like I’m wrong for being into things other than missionary-position sex.
Was it wrong for me to mention those things to her?
A) First of all, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with telling the woman you’re sleeping with what you like in bed.
As long as you aren’t forcing her hand in any way, or making her feel bad if she doesn’t like it too, pillow talk is perfectly healthy – and for many couples, it is pivotal to the relationship’s sex life developing and progressing into something amazing.
But I quite respect this girl because in a world of free porn and women feeling like they have to do and enjoy everything in bed (that’s never going to happen, by the way), she stood her ground.
But does liking any of this make you a pervert? No.
I enjoy most positions and I don’t know many people who don’t enjoy foreplay
I enjoy most positions and I don’t know many people who don’t enjoy foreplay.
This could be about her age – she is young at 24 – or it could just be sexual incompatibility.
Either way, you asked . . . and now you know.
It sounds to me that you both behaved very respectfully.
Celeb corner
I’VE always said cheating doesn’t have to be the death of a relationship – so I’m glad Sam Thompson and Zara McDermott are making a go of things again.
I felt sorry for Zara, as it seems she was in the early days of her relationship with her fellow reality TV star when the lapse of judgment happened.
Being cheated on is horrific and my heart really went out to Sam, too.
But I think they’ve made the right decision to give it another go.
They seem madly in love.
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