Lindsay Lohan must have realized that she is wasting her time (and ours) by continuing this back-and-forth bitch-fest with Paris Hilton in an effort to drum up publicity for whatever she’s currently pushing. Lindsay decided that because she has nothing really going on, she would try to level things up and get attention by piggy-backing off someone who is way more relevant than either herself or Paris. And she decided to go for the top by strangely commenting on a livestream done by Taylor Swift. And it worked! I mean, this post is all about Taylor Swift’s new album Lover, Lindsay is just a footnote, but look at her: right there in the beginning because Taylor’s kinda (totally) boring and Lindsay’s messiness is always “newsworthy”. So congrats on that, LiLo.
It seems that much like Justin Bieber when he picked a fight with Tom Cruise, Lindsay Lohan decided to try something with someone who is so much more important than them that they wouldn’t even realize it happened unless someone told them. Taylor was doing an Instagram live announcement about her upcoming album Lover when Lindsay decided to make a strange cameo appearance in the livestream.
Taylor was letting her oodles of fans know that she wasn’t just delivering you one pastel-painted music video and song–she don’t stop at one; she got a whole-ass album coming for you. And it is on the way soon. Taylor announced her newest single, You Need To Calm Down. It’s out now if you want to fill your ears with her latest sickly sweet children’s song:
It’s apparently a huge gay anthem? Like because she says GLAAD in it? And she’s all “political” now? And really into the gays? Well okay, but like if you want to get the gays, you need to drop a dance track that a go-go boy can shake his ballsack to. This is for children. It isn’t for us, but it is for Lindsay.
Lindsay commented with a heart-eyed emoji, and then scolded Taylor for ignoring her saying: “You should respond!” Then she commented: “My mom was in Cats!”
Lindsay needs to get into the message of Taylor’s latest Pixar movie end credits song and calm down while checking to see if her carbon monoxide detector is working, or while pushing away whatever shit she’s on.
Taylor also spilled the beans that Lover will be released on August 23rd. Wanna know the thing about August 23rd? It’s 8/23 written down, right? And 8+2=10 and 10+3=13 and 13=Taylor Swift’s lucky number. So there you go. It will probably be a #1 album because of all the lucky 13-energy. Also she’ll get assistance from the bundle deal of her selling her albums with insulin since her music is so sickly sweet it’ll give you diabetes, and poppers since she’s really trying to get us gays. All that will guarantee a #1.
Pic: Universal Music.
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