Kim Kardshian Stuns the World: I Hate My Giant Butt!

Before Keeping Up With the Kardashian — and even before her now-infamous sex tape with Ray J made her a household name — Kim Kardashian’s prodigious backside captured the attention of both star-making Hollywood power players and creepy internet pervs alike.

Actually, we now know there’s some major overlap between those groups, but that’s a conversation for another time.

The point is, the pop culture mainstream had never seen anything like Kim’s outsized ‘donk before.

These were the dark ages in which the three old white guys who run Hollywood still thought Jennifer Lopez had the biggest ass imaginable.

Kim single-handedly shattered the glass chair that had so long prevented women with genuinely giant butts from taking seats of power in Hollywood.

(It’s not a perfect metaphor, but you get the idea.)

You may be thinking to yourself, haven’t you guys spent enough time talking about Kim Kardashian’s ass over the years?

To which we say, you might as well tell Neil DeGrasse-Tyson that he’s spent quite enough time talking about space for one lifetime.

Anyway, we present you with this short history of ass for good reason.

You see, it’s recently come to our attention that Kimberly Noel Kardashian West is less than thrilled with her most famous feature.

This shocking news was delivered courtesy of a preview clip for Sunday night’s episode of Keeping Up With the Kardashians.

The scene starts innocently enough with Kourtney Kardashian throwing a bit of humorous sisterly shade:

“Kim, when you sit down your butt looks so huge,” Kourtney opined.

When she was rebuffed by Kris Jenner, Kourt objected:

“She likes having a big butt, I’m not saying anything offensive,” she said.

That’s when Kim made the sad reveal that her most coveted asset has become a burden:

“No I don’t! I cry about it on the daily,” Kim replied.

Now, this attempt to shame Kourtney for her joke may be a result of the ongoing Kim vs. Kourtney feud.

But it’s equally possible that Kim really is not a fan of her own butt.

It’s hard to imagine — like Kylie dissing her own lips, or Kanye deciding his ego is grotesquely oversized — but we suppose it’s possible.

So if you want to do some good for humanity today, head on over to Kim’s Instagram page and give a shout-out to the ass that broke the internet.

After all, where would we be without the trailblazing butt pioneers who made this country what it is today?

Actually, it’s probably best if you don’t answer that question.

37 Kim Kardashian Selfies That Nearly Broke the Internet

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