My Mum, Your Dad: How the single parents on ‘middle-aged Love Island’ have rivalled their children with racy snaps and posts about their glam lives
- My Mum, Your Dad starts September 11 at 9pm on ITV1 and ITVX
The cast of My Mum, Your Dad [MMYD] has been revealed ahead of the hotly-anticipated launch show on Monday.
The ITV show will see nine contestants aged between 44 and 58 including a postman, a PE teacher and a therapist appear alongside their adult children who have nominated them in hopes they will find love.
While it’s been dubbed the ‘middle-aged Love Island’, rather than sunning themselves in a Spanish villa, they will be roaming the gardens of a West Sussex mansion.
Yet while there’s set to be less bikinis and wild antics on show than in traditional Love Island, with one glance at the social media profiles of the MMYD parents, you’d be forgiven for thinking they were in fact Casa Amor bombshells.
The Instagram pages for both the parents and their offspring are littered with bikini selfies, lavish holiday posts and workout recordings, proving that the apple doesn’t fall from the tree.
One to watch: The cast of My Mum, Your Dad [MMYD] has been revealed ahead of the hotly-anticipated launch show on Monday
Monique and Taiya: Monique, 50, is a therapist and student from Winchmore Hill and her daughter Taiya, 21, is a student who lives in north London
Monique and Taiya
Monique, 50, is a therapist and student from Winchmore Hill who describes herself as being ‘kind-hearted and radiating love’.
Speaking about the main differences between dating in later life and dating in your 20s, she explained: ‘Dating in my 20s I just wanted to be loved, and I had very poor judgement.
‘I always gave people a chance. Dating now is more about how the person makes me feel in their presence, the memories you can build and whether there’s a connection.’
Revealing what impresses her in a romantic partner, she said: ‘Their attentiveness, chivalry and putting a lot of thought into a date.
‘I can’t stand a coffee date! For me, that’s somebody that’s dating multiple women in a week, I’m not going to be one of them!’
Two’s company: Monique (right) describes herself as being ‘kind-hearted and radiating love’
Stunning: Monique has an Instagram profile littered with stunning snaps in figure-hugging ensembles that highlight her physique
Bikini babe: Taiya always shares sizzling bikini snaps on her social media
Sweet: Taiya revealed she nominated her mother to be appear on the show because ‘ I think she deserves love!’
Her daughter Taiya, 21, is a student who lives in north London and revealed she nominated her mother to be appear on the show because ‘I think she deserves love!’
Taiya added: ‘She’s put everything aside to raise me and my sister for so many years so I thought now is my mum’s time.’
Speaking about her mother’s dating downfalls, Taiya said: ‘She goes on first impressions, if you do mess up the first time then that’s it for my mum!
‘I’m not saying everyone deserves a second chance, but some people do. I think she has messed up in the past where someone has deserved that second chance but she hasn’t given it to them.’
Sharon and Tia: Sharon, 53, from Sunderland is a safeguarding and welfare officer in education while Tia, 24, is a social media influencer
Sharon and Tia
Sharon, 53, from Sunderland is a safeguarding and welfare officer in education who describes herself as ‘fun, genuine, personable.’
Asked why she thinks her daughter Tia nominated her for the show, Sharon confessed: ‘She was getting desperate! I’d lost all confidence in myself.
‘I think for Tia she was wanting to give me a bit of a helping hand.’
As for what convinced her to take part, she explained: ‘Doing something so far out of my comfort zone is exciting, and the possibility of meeting someone special, but to open doors to new friendships as well.’
Revealing the advice Tia had given her, she shared: ‘Just to be myself. To be open. To speak to everybody, and look past just looks.
‘It’s about personality too – humour is a big thing for me. I like to have those belly laughs!’
Double act: Sharon (left) describes herself as ‘fun, genuine and personable’
Wow! Sharon previously competed as a bikini bodybuilder
Aww: Tia revealed she nominated her mother for the show because ‘I feel like it’s finally her time to be happy’
Tia, 24, is a social media influencer and revealed she nominated her mother because ‘I feel like it’s finally her time to be happy.’
She added: ‘I think she’s put herself on the backburner to bring up myself and my sister. In the last few years I feel like she’s given up on love, so she didn’t want to try anymore.
‘I hope putting her forward will be the push she needs to put herself first.’
Asked what she would consider the perfect partner for her mother, Tia explained: ‘Definitely someone who would put my mum first, no one has ever done that for her.
‘Also someone who is really funny! My mum is normally the funny one, it would be nice for mum to be with someone that makes her laugh for a change.’
Caroline and Karli: Caroline, 51, from South Lanarkshire is a tech advisor and scan assistant at a private baby clinic while Karli, 20, works as flight attendant
Caroline and Karli
Caroline, 51, from South Lanarkshire is a tech advisor and scan assistant at a private baby clinic and describes herself as ‘charismatic, outgoing and fun’, adding ‘I can be a bit fiery at times!’
On why she thinks her daughter nominated her for MMYD, she explained: ‘I’ve been single for such a long time, it’s probably the longest I’ve ever been single!
‘I’ve always been quite happy being single but I think she thought, “Mum, you need to get out there!”‘
On what impresses her in a partner, she revealed: ‘Just someone who is going to be kind and thoughtful.
‘I’m a wee bit old-fashioned, I like someone that can fix things and do DIY. I do like a man that can cook as well! If they can do both – it’s a bonus.’
Double trouble: Caroline (right) describes herself as ‘charismatic, outgoing and fun’, adding ‘I can be a bit fiery at times!’
Loving life: Caroline’s Instagram account features several smiley snaps enjoying time with family and friends
Supportive: Karli revealed she nominated her mum for the show because ‘she was single for a while and she doesn’t seem to have any luck with guys. So I thought why not?’
Karli, 20, works as flight attendant and revealed she nominated her mum for the show because ‘she was single for a while and she doesn’t seem to have any luck with guys. So I thought why not?’
Revealing what she’d write in her mum’s dating profile, she said: ‘I’d say my mum is good on a night out, she’s bubbly, a people’s person and is very loyal.’
As for what would make her mother’s perfect partner, she revealed: ‘Someone very kind and loyal, bubbly, with lots of energy. She needs a best friend type of person.’
And detailing what her mother gets wrong when it comes to dating, she explained: ‘She can judge too quickly sometimes.
‘One of her friends at her work tried to set her up with someone and she said no after she saw a picture as he had an earring in. I was like, “Mum, give him a chance, he might be a lovely guy!”‘
Natalie and Kaliel: Natalie, 44, is a self-esteem and relationship recovery coach from Bournemouth while Kaliel, 20, is a gas & plumbing apprentice
Natalie and Kaliel
Natalie, 44, is a self-esteem and relationship recovery coach from Bournemouth who describes herself as ‘adventurous, deep and outgoing.’
Asked why she thinks her son nominated her for MMYD, she explained: ‘I’ve been on my own for a long time. I think he thinks it’s my time for me now.
As for why she signed up, she said: ‘The journey of discovery for myself.
‘There was a big turning point after my last relationship where I knew I had to look at myself and do some real work on how I viewed myself and showed up in relationships and why I kept on ending up in very similar situations.
‘I think the journey of that and learning to love myself, and understanding what healthy looks like has led me to a point of having the confidence to do this.’
Stunning: Natalie has shown off her figure in a slew of scantily-clad snaps on Instagram
Journey: As for why she signed up for MMYD, Natalie said ‘The journey of discovery for myself’
Cute: Kaliel revealed he put his mum up for the show because ‘I wanted her to find someone and be happy’
Kaliel, 20, is a gas & plumbing apprentice and revealed he put his mum up for the show because ‘I wanted her to find someone and be happy. I saw it advertised and I thought it would be perfect for her.’
Revealing what he’d write for his mother’s dating profile, he said: ‘caring, ambitious, funny, thoughtful and kind.’
He described his mum’s perfect partner as ‘someone who is respectful, loyal, and has integrity. Also, someone with ambition too, and what they want in life aligns with my mum.’
Discussing Natalie’s dating history, he confessed: ‘I would say she’s been unlucky.
‘She’s probably picked the wrong people before that don’t have the same morals and aren’t on the same path as she is.’
Paul and Mazey: Paul, 51, owns a decorating company while Mazey, 21, is a student in Bath
Paul and Mazey
Paul, 51, is from London and currently lives in Bath where he owns a decorating company.
Asked how he would describe himself, he said ‘very chilled, laid back and loyal’, and revealed his daughter nominated him for the show because ‘she feels I need to sort myself out when it comes to dating!’
Speaking about himself, he added: ‘I think I’m a good date, to be fair. I’ve usually got a lot of interesting things to talk about.
‘I can only go on previous dating history. I’ve always gone back for a second date and it’s always progressed. So I’d like to think I’m quite a fun date.’
Time to slow down: Mazey revealed she nominated her father for the show because ‘I want to see him settled’
Hunky: Paul has shared shirtless videos working up a sweat at the gym
Thoughtful: Speaking about her hopes for her father, Mazey said ‘I want him to grow himself but also meet someone. They’ll share the same experiences’
Mazey, 21, a student in Bath revealed she nominated her father for the show because ‘I want to see him settled.’
She added: ‘The way he was dating before wasn’t working. I wanted him to date outside of the box.’
Speaking about her hopes for her father, she continued: ‘I want him to grow himself but also meet someone. They’ll share the same experiences.
‘Someone for him to move in with, really settle down with, come out and be happier knowing more about himself.’
Summarising Paul’s dating history, she said: ‘In his mind he thinks, “This is what I want” so will only go for that.
‘He’s only been dating on things like apps, so it really limits it to where they live, age and what they look like.
‘By nominating him he’s going to be meeting them, doing fun things with them and falling for who they really are. It means it’s not excluding people.’
Clayton and Christian: Pastoral support officer Clayton, 57, is from Nottingham while Christian, 35, is a graphic artist and warehouse employee
Clayton and Christian
Pastoral support officer Clayton, 57, from Nottingham describes himself as ‘pretty effervescent.’
He added: ‘I’m all about balance in terms of fun – I’d say there’s a cheeky side to me.’
As for why his son would have nominated him for the show, Clayton explained: ‘He’d like to see me settled with someone I could have a future with.’
Describing his ideal date, he added: ‘I like dates where we can hear one another talk.
‘So I like picnic dates. I like being by water, so a lake or the beach or something like that. A nice basket of food overlooking some water. I think active dates are better for a second date.’
Loving life: Clayton (left) describes himself as ‘pretty effervescent’ and ‘all about balance in terms of fun’
Out and about: Describing his ideal date, Clayton said ‘I like dates where we can hear one another talk. So I like picnic dates’
Christian, 35, a graphic artist and warehouse employee revealed he nominated his father because ‘I just want him to settle down, find the right person – he’s getting on now!’
He added: ‘I want him to live life with someone. I want him to travel with someone and get out there.’
Detailing his dad’s dating mistakes, he explained: ‘He’s just “on lock” straight away.
‘I get you’ve got to have attraction but equally don’t let that fool you; there’s a lot of pretty women out there, but they can be mean on the inside.
‘Take the time, have the conversations, study each other and find the depth with them.’
Roger and Jess: Postman Roger, 58, is from Derbyshire while Jess, 28, is a network rail planner
Roger and Jess
Postman Roger, 58, from Derbyshire describes himself as ‘fun, loving, conscientious, struggling to get old.’
He explained: ‘I don’t want to get old. I lost my wife, I know that you can get up and life can be over in a split second.’
Asked why he believes his daughter put him forward for the show, he said: She’s a lovely girl. Her mum was really thoughtful in everything – she could plan things to a detail – and Jess has got that.
‘She is so thoughtful and it was just a lovely thing for her to say, “Dad, look, we understand that you’re struggling and it’s been hard and we know that you’ve got a lot of love to give and we’re OK if you were to see someone else.”
‘Following my wife passing 18 months ago, I didn’t really want to meet anyone. You don’t expect it to be you and you don’t expect it to be your wife.
‘But I’m going on the show to get some confidence. I must have subconsciously wanted to meet someone by saying yes to the show.’
Fun times: Roger describes himself as ‘fun, loving, conscientious, struggling to get old’
Feeling good: Roger said ‘I’m going on the show to get some confidence. I must have subconsciously wanted to meet someone by saying yes to the show’
Sweet: Jess revealed that she and her siblings want their father to start putting himself first
Jess, 28, a network rail planner explained her reason for putting her dad forward, saying: ‘It was a joint thing with my brother and sister and it was our way of basically telling him that we were happy for him to start dating, if that was something he wanted to do.
‘It was a cop out on our part really, as it meant we didn’t need to sit down and actually say it. It was a sneaky way of saying, ‘Oh look at this, do you want to look into this?’ Never actually expected anything to come of it.
‘It was about putting dad first. We’d never really thought about us, or about ourselves in that situation. I wasn’t thinking about how I’d react, I was thinking about him.
‘The reason for that is he does the same for us, he would always put family first. So it was just a way of saying to him, stop worrying about us. If he wasn’t ready, that was also totally fine. It wasn’t an ultimatum. It was just, if you want to, you can, don’t worry about us.’
Elliott and Zachary: Elliott, 53, is a PE teacher and football coach from Essex while Zachary is a 21-year-old student
Elliott and Zachary
Elliott, 53, a PE teacher and football coach from Essex said his son would describe him as ‘good fun and easy going’ but insisted ‘I’m not easy going.’
On why his son nominated him for the show, Elliott quipped: ‘He wants rid of me!
‘I think the prospect of me being in his life for too much longer was a burden. No, he just wants me to be happy.’
As for what convinced him to sign up, he explained: ‘It’s something different. My life has turned into the same routine of getting up, brushing teeth, going to work, cooking dinner, going to the gym and going to bed. That is kind of it.
‘I couldn’t see any real change to that and then this opportunity came up. I don’t know why, but for some reason it’s something I feel I need to do.’
Time apart: Asked why his son nominated him for the show, Elliott (right) quipped ‘ He wants rid of me! ‘I think the prospect of me being in his life for too much longer was a burden’
Family man: As for what convinced him to sign up, Elliott explained, ‘It’s something different. My life has turned into the same routine’
Kind: Zachary nominated his dad because ‘h e deserves a chance to be happy and he hasn’t had that’
Zachary, a 21-year-old student, revealed he nominated his dad because ‘he deserves a chance to be happy and he hasn’t had that.’
He added: ‘I want him to have what a lot of his friends have done; get married and settle down. He deserves the opportunity to find the “end stages” of love.’
Speaking about his dad’s dating downfalls, he said: ‘I think he’s a massive overthinker. So overthinking stuff way too much.
‘Probably quite impatient with the process of dating. Maybe being a little bit selfish with his routine and not wanting to give that up.’
William and Janey: Janey is a singer and recruitment manager while William, 20, is a student
William and Janey
Janey, 47, is a singer and recruitment manager that describes herself as ‘fun, kind, outgoing and creative.’
Asked why she thinks her son nominated her she explained: ‘Because he’s lost all hope for me, he thinks I’m undateable! He wants me to meet someone.’
As for what people will make of her on the programme, she mused: ‘I think people might get me wrong at first.
‘I’m aware I might be judged on how outgoing I might be, and the fact my job is performing. In reality, I could be the most sensitive person there. And I’m emotional. I’m excited to meet someone that sees that side of me.’
Funny: Asked why she thinks her son nominated her Janey explained, ‘Because he’s lost all hope for me, he thinks I’m undateable! He wants me to meet someone’
Loving life: Janey describes herself as ‘fun, kind, outgoing and creative’ and loves performing
William, 20, a student, revealed he nominated his mother because ‘it’s getting a bit desperate now! We need a good chance of getting her to find someone.’
He added: ‘If it takes me to get involved, then that’s apparently how dire things have got!’
Describing his mother’s perfect partner, he said: ‘They’d need to want to dive in the deep end. They need to be confident with me to go and have a day out just the two of us, and to get on with all her friends.
‘Also someone that’s loving in general, and would put her first.’
New host: My Mum, Your Dad is the brainchild of host Davina McCall who wanted to see contestants ‘who’ve lived a life’ and show mid-life people looking for love
What is My Mum, Your Dad?
The show is the brainchild of Davina McCall, who is presenting, as she wanted to see contestants ‘who’ve lived a life’ and show mid-life people looking for love that ‘not all is lost for them’.
On the show, parents will undergo dates and bonding workshops while unknowing being watched by their children from an out-house with ‘pillows over their faces’ in embarrassment.
Cameras will not be in the bedroom as Davina said: ‘For me, personally speaking, I’d rather watch the hint of love, a moment of tenderness, something amazing. That’s so exciting but like… sha**ing?
‘It’s sort of like once you’ve seen… it doesn’t mean anything. This means f***ing something.
‘When you see people falling, you know this is serious. That’s so lovely. But yes, there are moments where the kids have got cushions over their faces. They’ve never seen their parents in a date situation.’
Instead of a competition motivated by prize money- Love Island’s premise – there are no eliminations or voting out and the children decide when it’s time for their parents to leave.
READ MORE: Inside the middle-aged love nest where stars of My Mum, Your Dad can get cosy with a freestanding bar, day beds and hot tub (but don’t worry kids, there’s no cameras in the bedroom!)
Davina said: ‘I thought one of the most moving things was this idea that as a child you can’t move on with your life until you feel that your parent is happy.’
The 55-year-old presenter, who recently moved in with her new boyfriend the hairstylist Michael Douglas, started crying when speaking about looking for love in mid-life.
She said: ‘I just wanted to see mid-lifers represented in dating and that second-time round thing.
‘Often what happens in your forties and fifties, is you’ve got children and things are complicated but more than ever you feel like you’re at that point in life where you deserve to find love.
‘You want to open the door and come home to someone and they do deserve that.’
Davina also spoke about the difficulties of dating in your 40s or 50s, admitting that struggles with confidence and self-esteem don’t get any easier as you get older.
She said: ‘It doesn’t get any better as you get older, sometimes you can rationalise it more, but it’s still there. We witness that a lot, and you are willing them, someone to go and talk to them about it.’
The former Big Brother host confessed that many middle-aged singletons struggle to understand dating apps, making it harder for them to find their second loves.
‘We’re of that generation where apps are weird, we don’t know how to do apps,’ she said. ‘Like ‘what do you mean you’re still talking to 17 other people when we’re going out?’, I don’t understand how that works! It’s hard isn’t it!’
Davina went on to describe the show as a ‘dream come true’ as she spoke about how she has always wanted to see middle-aged love represented on primetime TV.
She said: ‘When I walked in, I was literally beside myself. Firstly because it was like a dream come true to walk into an entertainment TV programme, primetime ITV, and see my people.
‘A bunch of mid-lifers, who all look really cool, really fun, culturally at the same place in life, we all understand each other, second time-rounders. It was really brilliant to be in a room with those types of people.’
My Mum, Your Dad starts September 11 at 9pm on ITV1 and ITVX. The series will run on consecutive weeknights for two weeks.
My Mum, Your Dad: Meet the single parents and their matchmaker kids!
Meet the parents … and their matchmaker kids!
Name: Monique
Age: 50
Location: Winchmore Hill
Profession: Therapist/student
How would you describe yourself in a few words? Kind-hearted, a believer in God and positive. I radiate love!
Why did your daughter nominate you for MMYD? To dip my toes back in the pool of dating, and try and connect with someone and find love, and experience living with other people again.
Name: Sharon
Age: 53
Location: Sunderland
Profession: Safeguarding and welfare officer in education
How would you describe yourself in a few words? Fun, genuine, personable.
Why did your daughter nominate you for MMYD? She was getting desperate! I’d lost all confidence in myself. I think for Tia she was wanting to give me a bit of a helping hand.
Name: Caroline
Age: 51
Location: South Lanarkshire
Profession: Tech advisor/scan assistant at a private baby clinic
How would you describe yourself in a few words? Charismatic, outgoing and fun. I can be a bit fiery at times!
Why did your daughter nominate you for MMYD? I’ve been single for such a long time, it’s probably the longest I’ve ever been single! I’ve always been quite happy being single but I think she thought, ‘Mum, you need to get out there!’
Name: Natalie
Age: 44
Location: Bournemouth
Profession: Self-esteem and relationship recovery coach
How would you describe yourself in a few words? Adventurous, deep and outgoing.
Why did your son nominate you for MMYD? I’ve been on my own for a long time. I think he thinks it’s my time for me now.
Name: Paul
Age: 51
Location: London, lives in Bath
Profession: Owner, decorating company
How would you describe yourself in a few words? Very chilled, laid back and loyal.
Why did your daughter nominate you for MMYD? She feels I need to sort myself out when it comes to dating!
Name: Clayton
Age: 57
Location: Nottingham
Profession: Pastoral support officer
How would you describe yourself in a few words? I’m pretty effervescent. I’m all about balance in terms of fun – I’d say there’s a cheeky side to me.
Why did your son Christian nominate you for MMYD? He’d like to see me settled with someone I could have a future with.
Name: Roger
Age: 58
Location: Derbyshire
Profession: Postman
How would you describe yourself in a few words? Fun, loving, conscientious, struggling to get old – I don’t want to get old. I lost my wife, I know that you can get up and life can be over in a split second.
Why did your daughter Jess nominate you for MMYD? She’s a lovely girl. Her mum was really thoughtful in everything – she could plan things to a detail – and Jess has got that. She is so thoughtful and it was just a lovely thing for her to say, ‘Dad, look, we understand that you’re struggling and it’s been hard and we know that you’ve got a lot of love to give and we’re OK if you were to see someone else’.
Following my wife passing 18 months ago, I didn’t really want to meet anyone. You don’t expect it to be you and you don’t expect it to be your wife. But I’m going on the show to get some confidence. I must have subconsciously wanted to meet someone by saying yes to the show.
Name: Elliott
Age: 53
Location: Essex
Profession: PE teacher/football coach
How would your son describe you? He’d say I am good fun, easy going (I’m not easy going).
Why did your son nominate you for MMYD? He wants rid of me! I think the prospect of me being in his life for too much longer was a burden. No, he just wants me to be happy.
Name: Janey
Age: 47
Location: West Sussex
Profession: Singer/recruitment manager
How would you describe yourself in a few words? Fun, kind, outgoing and creative.
Why did your son nominate you for MMYD? Because he’s lost all hope for me, he thinks I’m undateable! He wants me to meet someone.
Name: Taiya
Age: 21
Location: North London
Profession: Student
Why did you nominate your mum to go on the show? I nominated my mum because I think she deserves love! She’s put everything aside to raise me and my sister for so many years so I thought now is my mum’s time.
Name: Tia
Age: 24
Location: Sunderland
Profession: Social media influencer
Why did you nominate your mum to go on the show? I feel like it’s finally her time to be happy. I think she’s put herself on the backburner to bring up myself and my sister. In the last few years I feel like she’s given up on love, so she didn’t want to try anymore. I hope putting her forward will be the push she needs to put herself first.
Name: Karli
Age: 20
Location: South Lanarkshire
Profession: Flight attendant
Why did you nominate your mum to go on the show? She was single for a while and she doesn’t seem to have any luck with guys. So I thought why not?
Name: Kaliel
Age: 20
Location: Bournemouth
Profession: Gas and plumbing apprentice
Why did you nominate your mum to go on the show? Because I wanted her to find someone and be happy. I saw it advertised and I thought it would be perfect for her.
Name: Mazey
Age: 21
Location: Bath
Profession: University Student
Why did you nominate your dad to go on the show? I want to see him settled. The way he was dating before wasn’t working. I wanted him to date outside of the box.
Name: Christian
Age: 35
Location: Nottingham
Profession: Graphic artist/warehouse employee
Why did you nominate your dad to go on the show? I just want him to settle down, find the right person – he’s getting on now! I want him to live life with someone. I want him to travel with someone and get out there.
Name: Jess
Age: 28
Location: Derbyshire
Profession: Network rail planner
Why did you nominate your dad to go on the show? It was a joint thing with my brother and sister and it was our way of basically telling him that we were happy for him to start dating, if that was something he wanted to do.
It was a cop out on our part really, as it meant we didn’t need to sit down and actually say it. It was a sneaky way of saying, ‘Oh look at this, do you want to look into this?’ Never actually expected anything to come of it.
It was about putting dad first. We’d never really thought about us, or about ourselves in that situation. I wasn’t thinking about how I’d react, I was thinking about him.
The reason for that is he does the same for us, he would always put family first. So it was just a way of saying to him, stop worrying about us. If he wasn’t ready, that was also totally fine. It wasn’t an ultimatum. It was just, if you want to, you can, don’t worry about us.
Name: Zachary
Age: 21
Location: Essex
Profession: University student
Why did you nominate your dad to go on the show? He deserves a chance to be happy and he hasn’t had that. I want him to have what a lot of his friends have done; get married and settle down. He deserves the opportunity to find the ‘end stages’ of love.
Name: Will
Age: 19
Location: West Sussex
Profession: Student
Why did you nominate your mum to go on the show? It’s getting a bit desperate now! We need a good chance of getting her to find someone.
If it takes me to get involved, then that’s apparently how dire things have got!
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