Sex after having a baby is a delicate aspect of postpartum life — physically, mentally, and emotionally — and the reception for welcoming sexual intimacy back into the bedroom is different for every woman after giving birth vaginally or via cesarean.
According to the Mayo Clinic, there is no actual required waiting period for resuming sexual activity after having a baby, but the organization does note that most doctors recommend women hold off for 4-6 weeks to give the body time to heal. The clinic also asserts that feeling uninterested in sex in the immediate weeks or months following having a baby is totally normal. “There’s more to intimacy than sex, especially when you’re adjusting to life with a new baby,” Mayo Clinic staff writes, adding “Remember, taking good care of yourself can go a long way toward keeping passion alive.”
For many moms, sex simply isn’t a priority after welcoming a new human into the fold. Coco Austin explained during a 2015 “Mom Talk” with PEOPLE, “Everything is about the child, and nothing is sexual in your world.” For other women, like Kelly Rowland and Jessica Simpson, they can’t wait to get their hands back on their husbands after delivering babies.
Regardless of your sex drive after having a child, jumping back in the sack at your own pace is key. The Mayo Clinic encourages taking your time, especially during sex itself, and many famous moms have echoed this sentiment in their own lives after experiencing the physical and hormonal changes caused by pregnancy and birth.
Read on for candid stories from some of your favorite celebrity women on how they handled getting back into the groove of getting it on after having a baby.
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Kelly Rowland
Kelly Rowland joked to Entertainment Tonight in 2017 that she was ready to get her sex life “rocking again” after the birth of her son, Titan. “You know, that six-week period [after childbirth] feels like forever, and as a gentleman — [my husband is] very gentle, so he wanted to give me a little more space. I’m like, ‘No, let’s go!’” she exclaimed. “I’m still a mom and it doesn’t matter… I’m a woman and I have physical needs,” the singer said.
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Chrissy Teigen
During a 2018 interview with Women’s Health, Chrissy Teigen said regarding her and John Legend’s sex life post-baby, “It doesn’t matter who you are — even if you’re a sexy R&B crooner or an ex–swimsuit model, you’re just tired!”
She explained, “We still have that passion for each other, but are we doing it randomly in a dressing room? No! We’ll get back into it again.” The Cravings author added, “But it is funny: If he performs somewhere, and I go, I’m like, ‘Oh, he’s sexy.’ We’ll probably have sex that night.”
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Kristen Bell
Kristen Bell revealed during an appearance on The Talk that she and Dax Shepard’s two daughters had walked in on them having sex before. The actress hilariously explained, “We didn’t, like, continue … we sort of just went like, ‘Hey, what’s up? What do you need? What do you need?’… And then we just said, ‘Mommy and daddy are just going to take a nap for a couple of minutes.’”
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Pink
Explaining the ups and downs of her relationship with husband Cary Hart, Pink told The Guardian, “There are moments where I look at him and he is the most thoughtful, logical, constant … he’s like a rock. He’s a good man. He’s a good dad. He’s just the kind of dad I thought he’d be and then some.”
The singer continued, “And then I’ll look at him and go: I’ve never liked you. There’s nothing I like about you. We have nothing in common. I don’t like any of the sh*t you like. I don’t ever wanna see you again. Then two weeks later I’m like, things are going so good, you guys.”
“Then you’ll go through times when you haven’t had sex in a year. Is this bed death? Is this the end of it? Do I want him? Does he want me? Monogamy is work,” she exclaimed. “But you do the work and it’s good again.”
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Jada Pinkett Smith
During press for her movie Girls Trip, Jada Pinkett Smith said of postpartum sex, “I think every woman who’s had kids has definitely lost her groove at some point because, naturally, all of our focus goes into raising our child or our children. And then you just kind of wake up one day and you go, ‘Oh my gosh, where did I go?’ And then it takes us a minute to regain ourselves.”
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Whitney Port
In a video posted to her YouTube channel, Whitney Port explained how pushing “an eight-pound baby out of a tiny little hole” affected her self-esteem when it came to her body and sex life.
To her husband, Tim Rosenman, she said, “I thought a lot about if you were attracted to me and that was hard because I was never insecure before.” She added, “Sometimes I’d put myself in your position and be like, ‘I wonder if Timmy gained 40 pounds and had, like, a huge basketball sticking out of his stomach if I’d still be attracted … and I don’t know!”
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Kate Hudson
During a 2016 conversation with Nick Jonas for E! News, Kate Hudson said, “All women are so different. For some, their sex drive is just gone. For some, it amplifies and men are like, ‘Hey, you’re terrifying me.’ Hormonally, you just never know how you’re going to react.”
The actress and mom of three continued, “There’s sort of this great little bubble that you go into after you have a baby that both Mom and Dad sort of experience — and I don’t mean this in a negative way but in a very positive way — where [kids] shift the balance of the home. Some things [like sex] do kind of get put to the side.”
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Kourtney Kardashian Barker
After delivering her eldest son, Mason, in 2009, Kourtney Kardashian told her sister Kim, “Most people can have sex six weeks after, but the doctor told me to wait two months.” She said that once she and then-partner Scott Disick were given the green light to have sex again, they were excited to try, but according to Kourtney, “It felt like a metal pole is literally ramming you in the crotch.”
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Victoria Beckham
After having their youngest child, Harper, Victoria Beckham explained to Metro UK in 2013, “David and I are lucky to get down to business at all because Harper still won’t sleep on her own. David is so mad about her, he can’t resist letting her snuggle in and sleep between us. She’s a real daddy’s girl,” she said, adding, “But Mummy needs some Daddy time, too!”
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Jessica Simpson
Jessica Simpson admitted to PEOPLE that she “ignored” her doctor’s advice when it came to the waiting period for sex after welcoming her baby via C-section. “I’ve kind of broken one rule,” she said of only waiting 3 weeks rather than the recommended 6 to resume having sex. “I think I have the sexiest man in the world, so that’s the rule I break,” the fashion designer explained.
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Eva Amurri Martino
Eva Amurri Martino, celebrity blogger and daughter of Susan Sarandon, opened up about postpartum sex on her blog, Happily Eva After. “By the time the famous ‘six-week mark’ came around, I was totally not ready to hop back into the saddle,” she wrote.
“So we waited. And waited. And waited. Finally, it was nine weeks postpartum and I thought my husband was going to spontaneously combust, so we had sex… and it was terrible,” the blogger admitted. “In my opinion, having sex for the first time after birthing a baby feels like having sex for the first time ever. It’s awkward, emotional and extremely painful.”
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Coco Austin
“You don’t even want sex, that’s the thing,” Coco Austin said of her libido after giving birth to her daughter. “Everything is about the child, and nothing is sexual in your world. I never thought about it,” she shared during a November 2015 People’s Mom Talk chat.
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Jenni “JWoww” Farley & Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi
During a HuffPost Live chat in 2014, Jersey Shore alumna Jenni “JWoww” Farley said sex after having a baby is “worse than being a virgin,” adding, “It’s like a black hole.” Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi agreed, saying, “The only time I’m going to have sex is if I want to have a baby again.”
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