Sixteen budding entrepreneurs battling it out to win £250k of Lord Sugar’s own money as an investment to start their own business.
Alan goes into partnership with the winner — and that’s where Claude Littner and I come in.
We are there to make sure he chooses the right person, by watching what happens when the contestants are out on tasks.
People know it’s that time of year when they see Claude and I out on the streets with a notepad, pen and film crew.
We don’t mentor, we don’t coach or give any guidance, we simply watch what unfolds. And what is amazing to me is how often people try to wriggle out of things and deny a decision they made, in a bid to stay in the process. So when they sit in the boardroom saying, “I didn’t . . . ” we can say, “Oh yes you did . . . ”
Some people ask me if certain scenes are staged, but the show is unique in that there are no retakes, there is no setting up of scenes and no trying to find the comedy moment — they just come naturally.
All of Alan’s jokes come naturally, too. There is no script, no autocue, it happens as it happens.
Luckily, we get on very well — Claude, Alan and I. So much so that we all went on holiday together this year.
We’re all quite similar, we have all been married for a long time and we all share the same family values.
It makes us a watertight team, although we each bring something different to the table.
But, parking that for a moment, The Apprentice is also top-notch entertainment — this series more than ever. What’s great about the first episode is that the contestants, all of whom talk the talk about how fantastic they are, are thrown into the deep end with a task that’s designed to test their logic.
They are sent on what is a bit like a treasure hunt, in Malta, armed only with a map and some euros.
This task is all about logistics, negotiation and identifying, and let’s say it doesn’t end well.
It turns out that, unfortunately, logic is not something all the contestants are in possession of.
During this series we will travel all over the country, including to Glasgow to sell emerging artists’ work to the unsuspecting public.
When I say that task was more challenging than ever, I’m referring partly to the challenge of actually getting to Glasgow because it was during the storms. Remember them?
Turbulence was an under-statement. On the flight there, I was gritting my teeth and grabbing on to Claude like there was no tomorrow.
One thing I love about the show is that there are equal numbers of men and women, and they are on a level playing field.
Let’s face it, the same cannot be said out there in the “real” world.
One thing I’ve been reflecting on over the course of my time on The Apprentice is how much things have changed for women in business since I started out.
When I was having my kids 22 years ago, the very notion of “work-life balance” didn’t exist. But I’m pleased to say that working women aren’t trying to Have It All any more, and the days are gone when women feel the need to keep quiet about having kids at work.
Women are now more able to demand flexible working and feel entitled to have time off for, say, ante-natal classes.
More “mumpreneurs” are starting their own businesses. Still, you rarely catch working mothers using childcare as a reason for being absent from work — while men, I’ve noticed, almost get points for doing so.
And it is still the case that working mothers and women working flexibly are less likely to be promoted.
So I don’t quite agree with Ann Widdecombe, the former Tory MP, who wrote this week that women today have “never had it so good” yet still “whinge” about inequality.
Because while it might be true that things have changed for the better, most CEOs are still male.
Women might never have had it so good but it’s still not good enough — and it’s not “whingeing” to point that out.
All a bit Laboured by Jezza
HONESTLY, watching Jeremy Corbyn forgetting Labour’s six tests for a Brexit deal, when interviewed by the BBC’s Laura Kuenssberg, was like watching a hapless buffoon.
No wonder he got two Es at A-level.
This is the leader of the party that makes it up as it goes along – buying votes, promising everyone everything . . . and delivering absoutely nothing.
As Margaret Thatcher said, The problem with socialism is that you eventually run out of other people’s money.
Six must-sees for Apprentice fans
HERE, The Apprentice star Karren picks out some highlights to look forward to during the show’s new season . . .
- “Finding nine items” takes a twist this series when the candidates head off to Malta. One of the items our budding entrepreneurs are tasked with sourcing is a breathing apparatus used for diving, known as an “Octopus”. Confused by the specification “with a 40in hose”, the boys’ team heads to a fishmonger’s where a slapstick scene involving an actual octopus, confused fishmonger and a tape measure unfolds.
- I wear my slippers under the boardroom desk . . . and sometimes, when they film us from the side, you can see them in all their glory.
- The teams are tasked with manufacturing and selling some upmarket doughnuts. For one team, their “artisan” – which is more chucked together than hand-made – has added spice, which almost makes one candidate choke. And, on the other side, there’s little appetite for bashed-up “Best of British” buns.
- We visit the Body Building Expo in Birmingham – the world’s largest bodybuilding exhibition where the candidates are tasked with selling a service as well as a product. And we discover just how tricky doing a spray tan can actually be.
- Back in London the teams are challenged to create a marketing campaign for a new budget airline. Impractical uniforms and inappropriate branding lead to a bumpy ride in the boardroom.
- In Glasgow the teams must choose a contemporary artist to represent – then sell the work at their very own gallery event.
Oh, spare me Cosby race Tosh
ONLY a fool would deny racism exists in America.
But for Bill Cosby’s spokesman, Andrew Wyatt, to imply that Cosby has been unfairly treated because of his colour – comparing him to Jesus at the same time – is seriously wide of the mark.
Wyatt said: “Bill Cosby is doing great . . . Mr Cosby knows that God is watching over him . . . he knows that these are lies.
“They persecuted Jesus and look what happened . . . I’m not saying Mr Cosby is Jesus, but we know what this country has done to black men for centuries.”
Just to be clear, Cosby’s conviction has nothing to do with race.
The man is accused of rape and drug-facilitated sexual assault, by an astonishing 60 women . . . of all races and ages including some as young as 17.
He has finally been put in prison and his victims have justice. He is a vile rapist, a violent sexual predator.
His sentence is based on his crimes, not his colour.
Unlike Cosby – a “disgusting sexual deviant” according to one of his victims – Jesus was innocent of the crimes laid against him.
Cosby, meanwhile, has admitted to giving sedatives to young women in order to have sex with them.
In short, Cosby admits his crimes, the jury find him guilty and the judge sentences him.
Attempts to make this out as a racial issue are simply ridiculous.
Warne-ing for Becks over hair
I KNOW it’s hard for men to face up to losing their hair, but someone needs to tell David Beckham that by far the best approach when it happens is . . . acceptance.
But, judging from the photos of him looking a bit like a smiling Brillo pad this week that is not the route he is taking.
David, if you are reading this, you are a handsome man and no one cares if you have a thick head of hair or not – please don’t turn into Shane Warne.
Khloe's pregnancy confession
I guess the reality star has yet to realise no one is forcing her to go out.
She just needs to learn the power of saying no.
In the past, I had a dreadful habit of saying yes to an engagement when I meant no, then spent days trying to think of ways to get out of it.
I completely changed my life when I decided to simplify things by saying yes to an invitation when I wanted to go – and no when I didn’t.
Fred West sleepover is just sick
IT’S hard to believe not only that West Midlands Police are allowing “thrill-seekers” to spend Halloween in a cell used by serial murderer Fred West – but that they are charging them £75 to do so.
Offering this “spooky ghost hunt” at the notorious Steelhouse Lane cells in Birmingham is in very poor taste – so disrespectful of West’s victims, including his daughter who is a surviving casualty of his and is clearly still suffering every day.
No doubt the relatives of those West murdered still suffer every day, too.
So the fact that a stay in his old prison cell is being offered as Halloween entertainment is positively ghoulish.
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