Rotisserie Chicken is good for many things—nights when you’re too lazy to turn on the oven, game days when you simply refuse to use canned chicken for your precious Buff Chick Dip, etc. There are certain circumstances, though, when Rotisserie Chicken just ain’t gonna cut it. You wouldn’t present a new significant other with a piping hot, pre-made chicken when trying to impress them with your “cooking.” You shouldn’t serve a Rotisserie Chicken at Thanksgiving dinner because you’re too lazy to cook a turkey. And you definitely wouldn’t want to unwrap a candy cane, take a lick, and taste…chicken?! Right?
Archie McPhee, the same retailer that concocted Mac & Cheese candy canes — yes you read that right… Please do watch the video below of us trying to explain this flavor combo:
It should come to no surprise that the same company coming up with Mac & Cheese candy canes also sells Rotisserie Chicken candy canes. I know—I wish it were a joke, too. Archie McPhee’s website says, “You’ll wanna try these, unless you’re a chicken.” Well, yes, when it comes to poultry-flavored candy, I am indeed a chicken.
The description on the website encourages customers to “start a new Christmas tradition.” The set of six candy canes has the “same color scheme as crispy chicken skin,” which is yak-worthy enough. Who wants to eat a yellow and brown striped candy cane? The website assures that the candy also has “the same savory flavor” as rotisserie chicken, “with sweet mixed in.”
Perhaps the most shocking aspect of this whole thing is that people are actually buying them—and I feel very sorry for those people’s friends and/or enemies. There’s a note on the product page: “Because of their extreme popularity, we are limiting Rotisserie Chicken Candy Canes to a maximum of five (5) per customer.”
On Amazon, the candy has 3.2 out of 5 stars based on 32 customer reviews. One reviewer gave the product two stars, and says, “When I first opened one, the first thing that hits you is the smell.” Oh god. “I didn’t necessarily think rotisserie chicken. It smelled more like roast beef, or beef jerky to me (and not in a good way).” This reviewer also added that the candy canes would be “the type of product that pets would enjoy. You know, like meat flavored bones or chew toys.” I’m not well. Are you still with me?
Another reviewer tried the candy canes “out of curiosity” and was surprised at how much they really did taste like chicken. The aftertaste, though, really sealed the one star deal. “I’m dry heaving and can’t get the taste or smell out of my mouth,” the review says. “Would not recommended these to the worst person in the world.”
Most of the reviews with positive feedback are from people who were filled with joy after watching others try the candy canes and look absolutely revolted. One reviewers says, “Great for any party that you need a good laugh at.”
Don’t ruffle the wrong feathers this holiday season, or you could very well end up with Rotisserie Chicken candy canes.
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