With her voice quivering and tears in her eyes, Real Housewives of New Jersey star Melissa Gorga tells her sister-in-law Teresa Giudice in the latest trailer for the Bravo series’ ninth season, “I really don’t know if you’re ever going to really love me like your real sister.”
ICYMI: Melissa and Teresa’s relationship has gone through many ups and downs since Melissa joined the Bravo series in its third season. Their feud began after Melissa brought sprinkle cookies to a family Christmas party (yes, really), and things worsened the following season after Teresa got caught up in a sort-of scandal over a (fake) rumor that Melissa was once a stripper.
But after a lot of counseling, and Andy Cohen-hosted reunions, Melissa and Teresa eventually reconciled during the show’s sixth season. Now, most of the drama is in the past. For now.
“We’re not going to break the way we did before.”
In our candid convo this week, ahead of tonight’s season premiere, Melissa talked about just how much things have changed.
“We’re good,” she says. “Teresa and I, we are family, but we have different ways of approaching things, so we do butt heads…as I think a lot of sister-in-laws do. But we’re at that point where we are a family, and we’re not going to break the way we did before.”
Melissa says Joe Giudice’s deportation is “very hard.”
Now, more than ever, Teresa needs her sister-in-law’s support. In October, a judge ruled that Teresa’s husband, Joe Giudice, will be deported to his native Italy after he’s done serving a 41-month prison sentence for fraud. The family reportedly plans to appeal the ruling.
“I told her, ‘I know you don’t like to talk about these things, but you know I’m here’,” Melissa says. “It’s a very personal thing. It’s very hard when it involves kids. It’s hard to even talk about, so we’re all praying and hope that it turns around. We’re all just here trying to help and figure out what’s next.”
Melissa says her husband, Joe Gorga (Teresa’s brother), has spoken to Joe Giudice, and he’s “doing good” despite the ruling. But her nieces, Gia and Milania Giudice, appear to be having a difficult time. The 17-year-old and 13-year-old made emotional pleas in favor of their father on social media.
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This is one of my favorite pictures of me and my dad❤️ my father is no threat to society he is one of the most warm hearted people I know, he would never harm a soul. He puts everyone else before himself. I know who my father is and I think many of you do too. My father did his time and learned from his mistakes. Isn’t being in there supposed to make you realize your mistakes so you can become a better person? And that’s exactly what my father did. He hasn’t felt or looked this good since he was in his 30’s. We have so many plans to do as a family when he gets out. I need my father to be here. My father belongs with us and his entire family. My father came into this country when he was one years old, the United States is the only country he knows, spread the word #bringjoehome
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My dad , who is the best dad in the world, needs to come home. We aren’t done fighting dad. I can’t believe this is happening. I can’t imagine another day without you. We are gonna do everything we can to fight this daddy!! I love you with all my heart buddy❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️#heartbroken💔😢
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“It’s their dad, so it’s hard,” Melissa says, adding that she is unsure if the Giudices will go overseas. (Teresa, BTW, is taking it “day by day.”) If Teresa eventually decides to go overseas, Melissa thinks the show would not be the same without her.
“It would be so weird if Teresa weren’t on the show,” she says. “We’re the core group and without either of us I don’t know that it would work.”
Spoiler (LOL, not really): Melissa has issues with another Housewife this season.
This season, Bravo producers added new women and storylines to the mix. Jackie Goldschneider and Jennifer Aydin are the newest housewives, and true to form, each of them clashes with one of the original cast members, Melissa says.
“One is a little like me and one is a little like Teresa, and it just works,” she adds, hinting she and Jackie become good friends, while she and Jennifer have a bit of drama.
Another cast member who is known for stirring things up is Danielle Staub, who returns this season. RHONJ stans will recall Teresa’s iconic table-flipping in response to Staub telling her: “Pay attention, puh-lease!” Let’s relive its glory real quick, mmk?
Staub took a break from RHONJ after season two, but returned a couple seasons later as a “friend of the housewives.” She now reserves most of the drama for her husband, Marty Caffrey, with whom she has an estranged relationship.
“If you want the wow-factor, just roll in Danielle,” Melissa says. “You will see a lot of her marital issues. You’ll see the wedding, the bachelor and bachelorette party, everything.”
As for Melissa, her side of the family will play a bigger part in her storyline.
“You’re going to see more personal things about my mom, my sisters, and things about my father that come to light,” she says. “They really just came about naturally during filming, so it was kind of crazy, but it happened while the cameras were rolling.”
Oh, and her husband sometimes regrets ever doing the show.
Melissa’s marriage will also be heavily featured on the show this season. The couple has been married for 14 years, but some of Melissa’s ideas of what makes a good wife have evolved—while Joe’s have not.
“I just believe that it’s OK to be independent more now than I did before,” Melissa says. “I used to say ‘No, it’s all about making your husband happy.’ And I do believe that you need to make your husband happy, but I just think Joe is a little more old-school. I’m becoming a little bit more modern than him.”
In 2013, Melissa released an advice book titled, Love Italian Style: The Secrets of My Hot and Happy Marriage. The reality star received a lot of criticism for her stance on marital sex, which many thought seemed to promote marital rape.
In the book, Melissa wrote:
In another passage, she said:
At the time, Melissa said her words were misconstrued. Now, when asked if any of those philosophies have changed in the last five years, Melissa responds, “Completely.”
“Since I wrote that book, I am a completely different person, and I don’t know if it’s just age—I grew up,” she says. “I’m not saying I don’t believe in it any longer, because there were a lot of things in there that I do believe in, but we’ve been struggling a little bit just because I have different views. I’ve just become a lot busier and become a businesswoman, so it was really hard for him. It’s a woman’s world right now. It’s a movement and I’m with it.”
When we spoke, Melissa was in the middle of a busy press schedule to promote the new season in New York. She says her being in the city working all day was “hard for Joe.”
“It’s a woman’s world right now. It’s a movement and I’m with it.”
“Sometimes I think he sits back, and he’s like, ‘If we could take it all back and just make you come back home and sit on the couch and play with the kids….’ And I’m, like, ‘The kids got older.’ I’m able to go to work. They’re at school,” Melissa says.
“I think it just bothers Joe, because he just wants it to go back to when everyone was a baby and mommy was home all the time,” she continues. “I think if he could trade it all in, he would go back. I wouldn’t, but he would.”
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